That Thing

It holds me like I don't

want to be held after being

raped by someone I thought

  loved me

And the entire time

 I imagined being naked on a bed of

warm rocks that trickled water down

and gushed like an

oil well erupting for the

 first time

Wanting

 to be released

my back would not tense with

 strength enough to throw the

assailant off me

though now empty

inside

that warmth of invasion I carry

always

Needing not to look over my

 shoulder

Needed is a way to stand

 between two mirrors

to see my face as it truly

 is

and then turn around

 and know that

I am still there

This is my reality check

For I am not what is shown to

 myself from the mirror

on the ceiling

over my bed

Unless I choose that to be

That no one can take from me

Reviews

[.]

. oh, how absolutely profound and brilliant ... as an adult survivor of child abuse ... i can tell you ... that no one can take anything from us ... if anything hurts, it's the humiliation ... and if the humiliation hurts, it's because we have to respond when we are humiliated ... when we don't ... we get repressed ... and then a whole new set of problems start ... this poem is a masterpiece ... it would liberate many readers like me ...

[stellasautelle]

I like it.. it has a unique rhythm that adds to it