Confused

Here I am once again,

hopelessly confused,

lost between what I feel

and what I think I should feel.

I've heard the clichés,

their dated advice,

but how can I follow my heart

when my head tells me it's wrong?

But if I listen to my head,

will I ever be happy?

Around in circles go my thoughts,

dizzying and nauseating,

but what is worse

is that it could all be for nothing.

I'm driving myself crazy

trying to decide

if I should allow myself

to pursue my interest in someone,

without even knowing

if they could ever be interested in me.

And why would they ever have interest in me,

what do I have to offer?

Nothing, that's the sad truth.

Who am I?  What am I?

Just a sad little man

with an unpleasant face,

and a personality darker

than a moonless night sky.

But still, I hope,

and still I dream,

and still I worry myself sick

over something I'll never pursue.

I must maintain my silence,

once spoken, I'm revealed,

once revealed I can be hurt.

Better to wonder and worry

than to be rejected,

and better to wonder and worry

than to give up

and not care

anymore.

Author's Note

To hell with what your mother said about not saying anything if you can't say something nice. Just leave a fricking comment.