Lost and Alone

For Ben

Two months
Spent with very little contact,

Two days

Spent with none at all.

Too long,

I've been longing for any kindness.

I never received it.

I sit in my bed,

Unthinking,

Unfeeling and empty.

No, that isn't right.

I do feel.

I feel this aching,

This desperation to be held by you,

To have my tears wiped away by your hands.

Those hands were so gentle and so strong,

So safe.

My heart is empty,

How I wish this could be true,
And more than just a metaphor.