Without a Face

A short story I made about an teenager going through her struggle of being the ugly girl in her neighborhood

Without a Face

“What a lazy morning,” she said to herself. Kira’s birthday is tomorrow. She had never felt so dull and depressed for such an occasion due to no celebration being held. Her mother is still neglecting her needs, blaming her for the absence of her father, refusing to even acknowledge her child turning 16 the next day.

She lies in bed staring blankly into the ceiling admiring the glow-in-the-dark stars she placed there during her birthday last year. She smiles as she thinks of her friend Korah who gifted her the decor “Love is more than just a face” her friend told her as he presented her with the gift. Korah had now moved to Arizona. With life moving forward as it always has they had lost contact with each other leaving Kira alone

“More than just a face” she repeated in her head before pushing herself away from her bed and onto the mirror placed in front of her bed.

She tries to keep the positive thought of her friend's words but it all went down the drain once her face met the reflection.

Teeth so crooked she is reminded of all the rodent noises her tormenters mocked her for in school with acne on the side of her face it almost looked half red. Her eyes were uneven it looked as if she was looking the other direction. She exhales in frustration.

Kira’s only dream was to be as beautiful as the rest of her peers. To be finally seen as more than just a face. But no, every day she endures bullying from the townsfolk calling her names demeaning her by the second as every name lingered in the back of her head no matter how much she tried to make herself pretty or hide it with a facemask.

She grasped her face. “More than just a face,” she repeated once more as a tear rolled down her cheek. She had faith that someone would soon see that. But that faith is dwindling more and more every day as the horrors never stop occurring.

Her confidence is low, no pride is to be found in her heart. She spends most of her free time online conversing with randoms in Discord, hiding her face from the public with an anime profile picture. If she could muster a few friends online then surely she can gather a few of her own if they saw through the physical appearance

Will that day come? She can only pray. Her living conditions had not improved since her father left leaving them in a stalemate of constant bombardment of Electrical bills, School tuition fees, and rent. Her mother worked in construction but even the salary wasn’t enough to cover all the expenses. And her neglect made Kira often question whether or not school or life itself was worth pushing forward.

No the only good that can come out of her wretched appearance was with a miracle which is bound to never come.

“Kira come down here!” Her mother called her from the kitchen floor downstairs “Coming mother!” she answered before putting on an anime facemask. She had no intention of being troubled again if her mother mentioned one more time about how marrying rich would bring them out of their situation.

“Cook me some eggs and clean a bit” Her mother commanded. Kira obeys without question. She opens the fridge and picks up 2 eggs from the carton. They had been surviving with them for the past week She had already lost 8 pounds from the lack of protein and calorie intake this whole month of May.

“I’ll be leaving for work hours early tomorrow we need more hours if were going to survive next month and-“
Her mother spots a silhouette of her acne as Kira cooks beside her.

“Hmph…..” Her mother took a deep breath “Have you found yourself a worthy suitor yet?” she asked

“No” Kira responded bluntly

Her mother stared into the distance “We have to do something with that face of yours otherwise no one will ever want to be with you”

Her mother stared down her face once more aggravating her the more she looked at it
“You shame us… You shame me and now your father is gone because of you”

Kira gently drops the spatula
“I know” she turns on the stove then cracks two eggs into the pan

“You know part of me thinks what if you had not been born? would me and Harry’s life have been better?”

Kira had heard enough she left the eggs to cook by themselves before quietly leaving the kitchen

“Hey get back here!” Her mother called.
Kira ignored it completely and made her way out of her home

In the streets, she walks blankly kicking a rock as she paces endlessly with nowhere else to go

Not a word spoken but a mind full of dread. It's 5 pm which made her worry this is usually the time when the streets are packed. She feared that she would get judged harshly but home felt suffocating right now and anywhere is better than being there.

“Hey squiky!” a boy's voice came from the distance

“And so it begins” she thought in her head

She walks faster to avoid the heckler leaving the rock she had been kicking.
“Hey squiky!” the boy called again

“Please leave me alone,” she begged as she paced faster.

More voices followed from the boy “Squiky we just want to have a word with you”

One of the boys sprinted in front of her blocking her way.

Kira looked behind him and spotted 4 of them circling her

“What do you want?” she asked timidly
“We just wanted to know if you wanted to hang out with us, that's all.”

Kira looked below her then back to them “Really?” she hushed

“Yeah we’ll have carrots and nuts” The boys laughed “You stupid b***h no one would want to hang around your ugly a*s”

“You used to be so nice to me Nathan “ she said

“Um yeah because you had a baddie beside you, but she’s not really here now is she?”

“We want Korah!” one of the boys said in the background

Korah was always the more popular and cool one between the two. All the boys would drool over her in school but unlike the other girls she had a heart of gold having empathy for those that needed it and she knew that Kira needed it the most befriending her since they were in 4th grade. Even though they both became the best of friends, of course, Kira had always been jealous of the attention Korah got from school and the town. Because even her mother favored Korah over her.

Kira tries to leave again holding back tears behind her eyes but is blocked again.

Nathan Giggled
“No what I really wanted to ask is if you wanted to have fun.”

“What's that supposed to mean?” she asked

“I mean it's pretty clear that you're lonely, ever thought of changing that eh beautiful?” Nathan crept out a smile

For a second her heart jumped at being called beautiful but the offer he made made it all meaningless and disgusting, yet a small part of her was so desperate to be seen more than just a face, is this one of them?

“Leave her alone Nathan!” another voice arrived from beside them.

She looked at who was speaking, a boy slightly older than her tall and skinny with blonde hair.

“This is none of your business Jared”
Nathan responded

“Well, it's my f*****g business if you're going to cause a scene in my father's backyard, can you f**k off out of here and leave the lady alone?”

Nathan looked at Kira one last time before leaving, winking at her as he and his goons left. A sense of relief is felt within Kira but also disturbed yet intrigued by his offer.

“Are you alright?” Jared asked
Kira had now just seen this boy from up close. She had only realized how handsome this boy truly was towering over her with a lean physique and a sharp face that could rival a model.

“I’m ok” she quietly replied

“Sorry about that Nathan is usually kind of a jerk but he’s cool” Jared scratches his cheek “Sometimes…” he added

Kira didn't respond

“So where are ya headed?”

“Just passing by, nowhere really.”

“Well I really have nothing going on, maybe you’d like to go to the park with me you look like you had a long day.” He offered

Kira was skeptical of his offer knowing there is not a boy in this town that would ever even consider wanting to hang out with her let alone by themselves.

But she couldn’t just pass this by, after all she was lonely yearning for connection from just about anyone. She just felt lucky enough to be someone as gorgeous as Jared.

“Um sure….” she accepted
Though sounding hesitant this time, she felt a great excitement within her chest, engulfing her with joy.

“Let me just go grab a few things and we can go” Jared smiled before leaving

“A hangout with someone random?” she thought this only ever happens in the movies. And why does it seem like things are happening too fast? But none of it matters what matters to her now is that someone is paying attention to her, which isn’t malicious intent. For the first time in a while, she felt hope, for the first time she finally felt seen.

Though she was fully aware that Jared had yet to see her full face covering it with a facemask and sunglasses. How would he react knowing she was the town's ugly duckling? It worried her

After a few minutes of waiting Jared had returned with a small bag with what appeared to be snacks. Now wearing a leather jacket with baggy black pants

“Well, let's go then, I didn't catch your name by the way.”

“It's Kira” she began walking with him to the park

An hour passes…

The two conversed the whole time bonding over different anime and pop culture. in the beginning. Until he finally asked the question

“So why do you wear glasses and a facemask?” he gently asked

Kira hesitated, she knew this question was coming one way or another since it looked odd to be wearing sunglasses at 6 pm and a facemask in 2026.

She shook her head refusing to answer his question

Jared smiled softly “Don’t worry your safe with me” he chuckled

“I mean its not like you're the ugliest person in the world right?”

Kira looked around her feeling cautious of his comment

“But… if you are I promise not to judge, I only see people for who they are on the inside, I’m sure you're more than just, anything really”

Kira looked around her again feeling shame. She thought of all the nasty words said to her and her mother's words from a while ago lingering in her head like a tumor.

She made sure no one was around to see even if there was a slight population in the park.

Moving her hands as slowly as possible she takes off her facemask revealing the acne

Jared just looked at it without a reaction

She took off her sunglasses revealing her uneven eyes. As Jared still looked at it without flinching

Kira began breathing a bit heavy scared of what he’ll say

“It's ok you can put it back if you want I totally understand.

Kira felt slightly offended when he said that but at least he didn't laugh or make fun of her

“Most people laugh at this point”

“Well, people are stupid and can’t look within themselves. Always looking at other people’s flaws to justify their own self-hatred for themselves they refuse to see or if they do, they're just insecure you know…”

Kira smiled at what Jared said. Filling her heart with gleeful joy she had not felt in ages since Korah was in her life.

She learned a lot more information about Jared having gone to separate schools since their childhood and living in the neighborhood for about 2 years now. It's crazy how they have yet to cross paths with Kira having lived in her place since she was 9, the age her father left.

They both liked Anime and memes. Bonding with the same music taste of metal talking about how certain bands changed their life. Will Jared finally fill the hole that has been missing in Kira's life since her old friend's presence

Ever since she left she had been starved for affection and love. In a span of just a few hours, she already feels herself getting attached to Jared despite only meeting him today. But he did save her from Nathan earlier today. Though a small part of her still questioned whether or not he was trustworthy. She couldn’t ask for a better first impression than having been rescued from the town bullies.

It was now 9:00 pm stars emerged from the sky mimicking the glow in the dark decor she had back home. People had now left the park leaving them both together and alone it started to feel therapeutic. The calmness of the night brought gentleness in Kira’s soul, finally being able to breathe in this horrid life she’s living with a person she deemed good for her.

Jared and Kira had spent all of the afternoon in the park getting to know each other thoroughly. At this point, Kira had already trusted him completely especially knowing their similarities when it comes to likes and dislikes. She learned Jared had also valued being by himself.

Kira wanted attention almost desperately, but she never enjoyed the feeling of being alone, especially after years of having no connection in the real world following Korah's relocation to Arizona.

Jared did remind her of Korah. Not only were they both beautiful people but the fact that they both liked Anime and Metal made the comparison much more connected

“I don’t know about you but it's getting pretty late, and I don't exactly want you to feel drowsy during your birthday,” Jared says

“It isn't, it's not like I’m doing anything for my birthday anyway.” Kira giggled

“Well, we could do this again maybe.”

“I don’t mind at all, you’re-“ she took a deep breath “Different from most” she continued

“I’m not any different at all, I like to believe I’m just as fucked up as anyone else.”

“But you’re not, you’re very sweet” She smiled

“Well, how about we rock paper scissors for the last snicker wrap huh?”

Kira nodded

“Rock paper scissors” they said in sync

Paper for Jared, scissors for Kira

“It's not like I needed it anyway, you seem like you need it more than I do”
He commented on her weight issue

“Did you just make a comment about my weight?”

“Absolutely, from what you’ve told me today it seems that you and your family are struggling, maybe a snack would boost your morale a little bit….”
He smirked
“And you could gain a few pounds that is”

Kira hissed
“Well I for one would like to take the snicker anyway since your hard bodied”

“Thats a really gay way of saying you're fit” They both laughed

“Well, I think it's time that I went home Dad will kill me if he finds out I didn’t do s**t that was productive today.”

Kira looked below her dreading having to go home to her mother and returning to school in 2 days.

“Try not to let your mother's words get into your head ok, Kira. You’re more than just a face.”

Kira’s eyes lit up
“I… I am?”

“Well from what you’ve shown me you're a girl who likes manga and anime. Spends most of her days dicking around in Discord and loves the same music as I do so yes, your looks don’t mean s**t and you really ought to stop caring about that”

Kira smiled not even thinking about her crooked teeth exposing all of it as she smiled to him “Ok…” she said in a lighthearted tone

“Let's go home, I’ll walk you there alright?”

Jared helped her up from the grass they sat. She slightly trips making them both chuckle

Before heading home they both walked to a 7-11 just across the block buying slurpies. Blueberry for Jared, Strawberry for Kira

Their pace was slow still spending time together as they walked home conversing about school and the lives they had. It constantly made Kira jealous how good Jared had it in terms of financial stability.

Kira had not laughed and smiled like this in ages. With every laugh she made sounding like a car engine starting up. The whole time her chest felt lighter and her cheeks began to ache from too much talking and smiling. I mean her own prince charming coming to her rescue. She had only daydreamed of such things that were labeled as fantasy.

All the sorrow had disappeared even for just a little while

They stand outside her home. Kira’s eyes met his. The lamplights reflected their clothing. Jared's darker clothes blended well with the dark making him more attractive to her.
“I don't know about you but I would very much like to do this again.”

“Me too”

“Say tomorrow for your birthday how about we meet up at the park again around 1:00 pm since you're not doing anything at all?”

“Really?! I mean sure I would like that very much!” she exasperated

“Ok then” he giggled

“So yeah…” Jared awkwardly stated

“Yep” Kira responded

She didn't wait for him to act, Kira immediately went for a hug embracing him tight into her body “Thank you so much” she says with sniffles in her nose having been overwhelmed with joy today

Jared gently tapped her back “Thank you as well, you really made my day much better”

“You can talk to me anytime you want when you're feeling low” he told her

“I will Jared” she responded happily

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“I’ll see you too”

They waved at each other before Jared took his leave and Kira went back to her house with a radiant smile across her face.

Inside it was quiet, she was simply too pumped with adrenaline to even eat something out of their really empty fridge. It's like the world was shut down her mind was only fixated on Jared ignoring the dirty kitchen and the note her mother had left her on the dinner table.

She goes upstairs into her bedroom and immediately lies down in her bed looking at the glow-in-the-dark stars once more. She clung to her pillow tight pretending it was him. Sniffing it and burying her face in it, yelling into it with the amount of butterflies in her stomach anticipating their meeting tomorrow

Kira had felt as if her looks no longer mattered at this time. Feeling herself completely without the sunglasses and facemask to hide her identity

With a heart now full of joy and love she could finally sleep with ease without the need to stress. She chuckled one last time before shutting her eyes. A really good morning awaits her tomorrow.

The Next Morning

She opens the curtains as the morning sun shines upon her face. She plays happy-go-lucky music on her phone to set the mood for the day. A friend who brought life back into her own hands.

“This just might be a really good birthday,” she told herself

Her mother had already left early so she went downstairs to cook herself a decent breakfast of eggs and hot dogs, humming a song as he cooked her meal. After that, she went on her Discord, fidgeting with her feet like a woman possessed talking to randoms on a mental health server, delightfully explaining the friend she had met yesterday. She didn't even care that it had only been a day. The adrenaline and affection she got overwhelmed every negative thought she had for the past year.

She woke up at 7 am. One more look at the clock “It's only been 2 hours?” she thought as time was going extremely slow on her end. Not even having the patience to wait 3 more hours she decides to get ready already.

She put on her favorite clothing, and though she planned on wearing a face mask and sunglasses, as she had the day before. She made an effort to put on some makeup to desperately cover up the acne on her cheek. Lipstick to hopefully overpower the crooked teeth. And an eyeliner, it won't make up for all the nastiness of her face but with the slight chance it would make her slightly beautiful then she took the risk.

Like lightning fueled with joy, she exits her room bringing with her a bag of treats she and her mother had ignored in the cabinets. A few candies and some chips.

Her pace for the park was moderate but her thoughts ran faster than she could. Anxiety began to conquer her mind like what if he had been lying to her this whole time or that he won't show up. It didn't matter because she knew where he lived. As creepy as it sounds. What if everything he ever told her was nothing but a facade to take full advantage of her vulnerability? These thoughts plagued her, scaring her even that maybe she had been way too trusting. Either way, she’s going to find out pretty soon

Kira had made it to the park, and she began hearing voices one that sounded way too familiar

It was Jared, “already here?” that was quick since he mentioned 1 pm.

She made her way to the sound of the voices but hesitated as other male voices began to emerge. “Huh?”
She didn't want to be nosy but they had not spotted her yet. Would it be best if she eavesdropped just a little bit to see what they were talking about?

She snuck her way behind them like a cat she hid behind a garbage bin to hear what they had to say. She prayed it wouldn't be about her

“I almost couldn't believe it” Jared spoke

“I bet it wasn't that hard, she’s already begging for attention I bet low-key”

What are they talking about? She asked herself

“You even got her to take off the mask and sunglasses” one of the boys laughed hard

Hearing that line alone made Kiras' heart skip a beat, they were indeed talking about her.

“That's one more for you, that's the type of s**t that happens when you don’t have to think to get laid, you're clearly too good looking for your own good Jared” one of the boys said

“Shut up” Jared pushed the boy

Kira could not believe what she was hearing right now, but for some reason, she had already somewhat expected and seen this coming. Jared had clearly only done it out of a dare.

It drained her enthusiasm to a full low. Her heart sank deeper than the ocean. In a span of just a minute, her world began to crumble before her yet again.

Her hands started shaking, as salty seas emerged from her eyes.
She didn't think it through she dropped the bag full of goods and simply walked away telling herself to never show herself in this place again.

Back home
At 10 pm it stated on the clock that it was now past 14 hours from their meeting plan.

She had been staring at the floor, sitting idly in her bed with both feet planted on the surface.

Ears ringing, thinking, and more thinking not a single positive thought crossed her brain. She only thought of the betrayal. Her thoughts went deeply into all the kind words he once spoke. Now only exaggerating the pain mocking what little pride she had left.

She couldn't think of a more horrific birthday than today.
The room was dark, the curtains were closed, no music playing just her mind replaying memories of not just Jared this time but her whole life. More and more it appeared that she was just a face.
a face of horror, a face of self-torment and hatred

Gently she placed her nails in her face covering it in shame. Another thought of Jared crossed her mind. It ticked her as she aggressively clawed down her entire face leaving a small mark of gash.

She took a deep breath hysterically gritting her teeth tight in an attempt to break it with a scream that cannot be heard

“God….” she cried praying to a God that had forsaken her. Anxiously looking for something to distract her until.

It snapped in her head. If this is how my life will be then I refuse to go down with it, a puddle of my own tears

“I refuse to live this way, I refuse to die like this” she softly said in the damp wind in the airless room where she sat

“No more…” she sat up with a blank state of mind now numb and empty and gently made her way downstairs

a blackened heart and a mind full of terror a face stale it spoke nothing when looked upon.

She grabbed a kitchen knife mildly and lethargically made her way to her mother's bedroom.

Kira stared her down. Her mother was passed out in her slumber a mouth open snoring like a pig with saliva drooling from the side of her lip.

Her words spoke in her head “We need to do something with that face of yours otherwise no one would want you”

Without a reaction, she slit her throat while she slept

Kira immediately felt instant regret for a split second

An ether cut off from her throat, her mother awakens with eyes gaping in horror as she sees who did the act.

Kira just looks at her unreactively slightly grinning as some euphoria enters her chest yet still a lingering thought of regret tries to yell its way back to her conscience.

Her mother crawls out of the bed clinging tightly to her throat as blood poured out of the slash trying to get out words that can't be articulated.

Choking on her own essence she pleads for her daughter to stop by waving her hand

Kira hesitates and pauses. She begins breathing quickly looking at the state of her own mother. She acted, forcibly maneuvering herself, stabbing her a couple of more times in the chest each stab she took felt like killing something unkillable. As hesitation and trembling hands weakened the attack.

A death gargle was last heard from her mother as she passed away, her eyes rolled to the back of her head.

Lifeless in a bloodied gown

“Oh God!” she yelled inside the quiet room.
Kira with the adrenaline now coming down her hands began to shake even harder.
“Mom…” she cried
Covering her mouth in disbelief at what she has committed

She observed the crime she had committed as the blood of her own mother flashed before her face. Suddenly, she stopped and vomited on the floor.

Should she call the authorities in her head she thought. No, it was already too late as the deed is done.

She wipes the vomit stains from her mouth and takes a deep breath before resorting to her stagnant state.

There was one more life to take.

And there she spots him luckily sitting alone at the park by himself in the middle of the night.

She traced him from behind as lurking memories from yesterday began to play. His kind words, somehow played in a joyful manner in her head. His smile, how he treated her well. The bond they shared even for just a day. For a split second, she thought about not doing it.

Then reality came again…

With full force, she smacks the back of Jared with a rock knocking him as he stumbles to the ground

He made no sound

Slowly he turned around to see who did it gripping the back of his head

“Yo…you?”

And there she was standing still looking upon her betrayer hands slightly shaking no mask to hide her face just the raw look of her repulsive visage.

He wasn't so handsome anymore in pain

“I…. I didn't mean…”
He tries to get a word out but is too stunned

“I’m sorry” he pleaded

Kira's eyes went from blunt to sympathetic for a moment. Slightly regretting her action just now. But it was all too late.

She placed her steps towards the stunned boy then stabbed a knife through his heart fueled with more rage than what she had shown her mother.

She exhaled 2 quick breaths but instead she felt…

Free…
Relief…

Like the world had just stopped talking, relieving her from all the torment. All the rage and hatred in exchange for 2 lives that broke the barriers of the love she had.

Kira pushed herself away from him, wiped the crimson from her clothes, and looked at the stars up in the sky “This is my face”