The Amoeba x 3

At my club some support England and others Ireland at cricket though three chaps were very ungracious in defeat, so I took remedial action!

There grew three amoeba neath a stone down at Tom's cricket club

you could tell by the look of them they were fond of their grub,
rare strains, scientifically coded Shane Mullet, big Hank & Bobby Mac 

England to the core but mention Irish cricket and your health they'd attack! 

So it came round, England drew Ireland at the 2011 cricket world cup
those amoebas grew anxious, emitting a putrefying stink with each, tut tut' 
just because England play test cricket, Ireland an associate nation
and dare England lose it would cause grief, world upset and sensation !

But cricket's a funny old game quite often it will throw up a twist
and England got hammered by a country, they claimed didn't exist!
Yes Ireland's Kevin O'Brien bate the pommes all around and over the place,
as them amoebas went berserk, turning first green, then bright red of the face!

So Tom formed a plan, to rid us of these germs like those found down a loo, 
how could we put up with their stink, if England didn't qualify and get through?
He told them dumb a*****e amoebas some silly old spake,

that England's skipper Paul Collingwood, was feeding the ducks down by the lake!

Off they slithered down to the water's edge oh so quick
to see who could crawl first, to the Englishman's bum for a lick,
when all three had gathered together, Tom knew that he'd got'em,
he shoved them into the water and they sank straight to the bottom!

Now despite their big egos, the rest of us know only too well
the amoeba is a simple life form, it has only one brain cell,
it will live very happily far beneath on the base of a pond,
with its friends the bacteria, leeches, toad and frog spawn!

Now don't worry yourself about our amoeba x 3
they say that pond life enjoys its own company,
down by the lake their voices can still be heard 
blabbing away, about the bizarre and absurd!
So feel free to wade into the water

and on top of them release....An enormous, 'King Richard the third'!

Reviews

[Lydia Shutter]

Your writing about cricket leads me to want to learn more about the sport. Certainly the avid fans are a special breed. Sure, football (American) has fans, but it seems wars spark between teams of cricket! Emotionally packed poem. Good one. Lydi**

[Tom]

Thank you Lydia, I think its a man thing! Perhaps to much testosterone and alpha male dominance fueling all this adversity ???

[Lydia Shutter]

There's no doubt in my mind, Tom! :)

[Tom]

Ha ha or should that be He, he he, !

[Lydia Shutter]

Laughing here

[Epipsychologist]

Sounds like most of the fun was had after the game. This was a funny story and a good write.

[Sheila Kline]

OMG, this is hilarious! Your knowledge of the game of Cricket shines through again, right through the waters where the amoeba is resting after your dire plot! But isn't King Richard the third resting under some parking lot? Now, you have me pondering what you mean of the reference to the old king. Oh my, is it a "potty thing"?....that would be hilarious! More food for the little single cells with big egos!! Well anywhooooo, it is another interesting read. Perhaps I should bring one of my ghoulish fiends over to assist!...lol I am a BOWYER by birth and The Bowyer Tower and King Richard III have an interesting history -hummmm. I think I am getting myself further down into that water.......laughing!

[Tom]

Please don't go near that water Sheila as your suspicions are correct, it is a 'potty' thing but thanks for checking on the well being of the 3 x Ameobas !

[Angi]

Ha! I loved the title, it totally drew me in. Was I surprised to see this was about Cricket!! The amoeba is indeed a simple life form. Be wary, though. Those organisms can infect and obliterate the weak. Ha! That should spark some cricket~ish outrage in you! Ha! Just joshin' old pal. heehee. Angi~

[Tom]

That's why I had to get rid of them Angi, before they got out of control ! Thanks for reading.

[Aethereal]

You sure know how to liven up this international game with strange metaphors. Amoebae have their own games to play as they extend their pseudopodia around their prey, and reproduce by fission. Paramecia would make the best cricket players since they are half animal and half plant whereby they could receive energy from the sun as they move about bumping into each other on the surface of a pond propelled by their cilia. Sperm cells play cricket with eggs all the time.

[Tom]

And everyone of them could bat, bowl & field better than yours truly here! Thanks Aethereal for this David Bellamy like synopsis! Fascinating indeed !!

[Aethereal]

You're welcome! I was just extending your metaphor.

[Frieda P]

Great read Tom, always an entertaining read from you, never knew cricket could be so much fun...where's the music, cue the music! ;-)

[Tom]

Keep on rocking & rolling with me Frieda !!!

[Frieda P]

Sure will Tom!!

[Great Aunt Astri]

Oh this made me laugh! ... and I am not even a man ...I hate cricket! But I am sure the amoebas will be happy with the 'King Richard The Third'! because 'where's there's muck there's money'!

[Tom]

What truth you speak Great Aunt Astri !

[Great Aunt Astri]

Don't give me credit for it....it'what my Granddad used to say!

[Tom]

A wise man he was too...

[Sami Khalil]

I never learned cricket but I love to do that one day for I know it is popular in so many parts of the world...A splendid read and write...:)

[Tom]

Thank you kind Sir, I will teach you and I bet you would be an excellent pupil !

[Sami Khalil]

Hahaha...Thank you kindly...:)

[Marie]

You're not the only person who write of cricket...it must be a very emotional game...

[Tom]

I believe that's so Marie but I wonder if I'm the first on Writer's cafe ? Thanks again for reading & commenting!

[Marie]

Avenish's "The Battleground" winds up a cricket game with murder...

[Tom]

Thanks again Marie, I'll have to check that out !