Teaser(Nozomi's thought)

A look in Nozomi Kishimura's thought. Trigger Warning: References to abuse, mental abuse, and suicide.

(Note to Readers: Before you start wondering why this teaser has so many grammatical errors, it’s because one of the symptoms of schizophrenia is that you can’t talk right, well it seems right to the person but not to the rest of the world. So when you read this, just remember that’s how she talks.)   

My name is Nozomi Kishimura. I am a seventeen year out girl who has schizophrenia, which means that I have hallucinations and that I am delusional. I am a very paranoid person for good reasons. I’ve been in a mental institute twice in my lifetime.The first time was when I tried to kill myself and the second was when my parents just got tired of me being around. People treat me as a social outcast because I can’t talk right and I constantly have bruises all over my body and cuts on my wrists. They think that I am emo, but I am not. My inner demons are the ones responsible. I swear it’s true. But no one ever believes me. It’s because no one but me can see them. They punch and slash at me whenever I am alone. I think that there are five of them, the demons. They don’t have names because why the hell would I give them names. One of them is very tall. It is about six feet seven inches. Plus he is really thin, like bony thin. It is the one who verbally abuses me. It calls me bad names and causes me to cry a lot. Another one is a gray snake that is very short. It is as long as an normal sized pen. It may be small, but it is very crafty. He gets into my head and tells me bad stuff, like I should kill myself and that no one in the world will ever love me and similar stuff like that. The third one is a shadow figure. It likes play pranks on me and it causing me to trip and knocks stuff out of my hand. It doesn’t talk though. It just follows me around. The fourth one is a mangled corpse. It is a man that has only one eyeball, which is hanging out of his head. He has no lips so his teeth are constantly showing. His rib cage is showing and his intestines are hanging out of his stomach. He is the one who hits me. He likes to punch and kick me. The last one is a duplicate of me. But she has black hair instead of my blue hair. And her eyes are red. She is the one who cuts me. She uses knife that looks like it’s made of bone. It has weird symbols on it. The good thing is that only one demon can appear at a time, well except for the shadow figure, it follows me everywhere hiding in my shadow. I hate my evil twin the most because she is the one who causes me the most pain. Did I say that I can touch them? If I didn’t, I am sorry. Yeah I can touch them as they can touch me. But I don’t have enough courage to do that, because I don’t want them to hurt me more than they do. I don’t know how much more I can take before I try to kill myself again. It’s so lonely. It’s too lonely. I live in a world that doesn’t care about me and that alienates me. Sometimes I wish that these demons would just kill me, so I wouldn’t have to suffer anymore. God, if you are real, please just give me one friend.

Author's Note

Hope you enjoy this teaser for my seven part story coming soon. Please leave comments so that I can get feedback on what I can approve on.

Reviews

[KnightOfAnarchy]

I really like this, schizophrenia is a very serious disease that isn't taken very seriously.
In fact most mental illnesses aren't.
My uncle died from it but I never got to meet him.
It's one of the worst illnesses you can have in my opinion
With that said all the demons are very symbolic to who she is and are her own personal demons.

We all have our own demons.

[Tsubaki Kuro]

Thanks a lot. I agree with you, schizophrenia is a serious disease that isn't taken very seriously. And I sorry about your uncle.

[Eisho Shu]

This teaser generate so much potential. Each demon is really interesting. I'm sure each one have its reason for being like that. I really would like to read the actual story. Also, this style of writing seem to fit you really well. It is not like other style isn't good but this match you perfectly.

[Tsubaki Kuro]

Hahahaha it does. If you noticed, I made the fan fiction piece into six parts now so i can focus on this one. This story will be amazing. You can't see it but I am super excited.

[Érenn]

Interested, very interested to know what happens throughout these seven parts. You got me good. This is my kind of story, in terms of description and symbolism. I love it ^^. I like how you have explained and described each of these demons, reminds me a lot of religious contexts read before. A lot of clever references used. I like it much ^^

[Tsubaki Kuro]

Hahaha I'm glad that i got you hooked.