Sample E

Rum

A new taste

Conceived between

A momentary lapse

Of finger fumbling

Rubbing inside

The center seam

Of mental

Inoculations

That slithering taste

Breathing deep

Down into

Darkness seeing nothing

But feeling light

Even though it

Was heavy

Bathing beneath the

Audacity of

Tongues too

Exactly retracting

Supervising

Imposing

Wetness seeping

Through to

The outside

Only to be neglected

Because timing

Is everything

And it was

Drying up

But not really

Because in our Minds

Time is just

That thing

And that thing

Is just a lie

Laying tenderly

Open hoping

That those fluttering

Palpations

Would be enough

To distract

Us from

The growing threat

Of someone

Knowing

The precision of

The words filtrating

Through those

Lips we used

To misappropriate

Everything

We are about

Ensuring our safety

Locked up

Inside those

Overlapping

Embosomed

Attractions…See

It’s more than just sex

When love is a factor

Reviews

[Engulfed in Flames]

very well done...less concealing than your other work..but excellent indeed.

"See it's more than just sex when love is a factor" very powerful line...

this poem is the most straight forward you've ever been...

i get a sense of hiding...like your love is a secret...

well done...

[Raef C. Boylan]

This is really nice.
Except it doesn't taste like rum...or does it...or does that mean something else like you like rum so you compare it to rum like some people like winnie the pooh and compare it to hunny?

"Because timing
Is everything
And it was
Drying up
But not really
Because in our Minds
Time is just
That thing
And that thing
Is just a lie" - the conspiring tone of this helps the reader get a sense of the couple's closeness; that they share and discuss ideas, increasing intimacy.

"To distract
Us from
The growing threat
Of someone
Knowing" - suggestive of danger. Knowing in the moment, like being caught because in a not-so-secret place, or knowing in general?

"See
It�s more than just sex
When love is a factor" - maybe the nicest straightforward sentence i've read in your work. There's some smugness here, but of the nice variety: hints of overdue security and relief as well as cosiness, maturity and understanding.

Great job.
Less cryptic than some of your other pieces, and kind of endearing for that to start with...but also well-written, with a pleasant narrative voice.

Thanks for posting this.

[lostintheworld]

yeah...
it is

and you
said it...

i like it
a lot