My Hell

My Hell, your real world

In my eyes the Earth is a rectangle,

Freezer cold,

Shady dark,

Breath taking,

Ashes upon ashes,

Wasted away,

One tree,

So shut your mumming mystery mouth,

With the people,

So pale and white,

Blue berry lips of ice,

Purple faded eyes,

White raggedy blood clothes,

Bare feet,

With sharp shiny shards of glass in them,

This here,

Is my Hell,

Author's Note

I meant for it to be better..It started to fade at the end. Sorry.

Reviews

[Timeless-Chan]

I don't think the end fades at all but i'm not going to pretend to be an expert on peotry. I do enjoy it the meaning and the very strong feel of the poetry towards the middle of the piece^_^ keep up the good work!
`Dreamer

[Serena Kaye]

Heh, thank you!

[Admiral Kirk]

This is very good, and very descriptive. Keep up the good work. :D

[Serena Kaye]

Thank you and I will.

[Admiral Kirk]

:)

[Dr. Wood ?]

I think the end is perfect but I do understand your trepidation...I have that a lot with my efforts...This was very good I thought. We all have our own idea of HELL

[Serena Kaye]

Thanks, pft, yeah we sure do..:3

[Dr. Wood ?]

sorry I did'nt review earlier. I had no knowledge of the read requests until now

[Serena Kaye]

It's quite okay.
No need to be sorry.

[Rhea752]

When Hell freezes over!!!!!! bwahahahahaha!!! nice one!! :)

[Serena Kaye]

Heh, thanks.:3

[BorealPoet]

You know the fade actually adds a nice touch to the overal piece. Great work!

[Serena Kaye]

Heh, thanks.

[~Sara~]

Grreeaatt job! As I read your poetry, I know more and more that your talent is at its greatest when you use your vantage point on things. Thanks for sharing!

[Serena Kaye]

Thank you!
&' no need to thank me.(:

[Tai Ryens]

Ah, no need to be sorry about anything Rena. You've done well.

[Serena Kaye]

Thanks Ryan.

[TheJordBaker]

good write, some really nice lines in there, picks up really strongly in the middle. keep it up :)

[Serena Kaye]

Thanks, and I will!