His Own World*

This was a random idea I had one night while sitting on my bed, imagining things in my own world.

 

            The plan was evil, innately vile. 

Involving lying, coercing, betrayal and ultimately pain, this plan was the product of a single, four letter word: pity.

 

She said it, and his idea grew.

 

He couldn't control it after the words had fallen from his lips. This story thus has no happy ending, only the lesser of two evils.

 

            [Landon] was a boy who had never really felt comfortable with people. He lacked a modicum of self-confidence making him depressive and cynical. Most of his friendships were superficial, even though he mostly convinced himself they held depth. He loved cartoons, some video games, which he tried to like more so than did, simply because he wanted to try and get better but most of the time just got frustrated, had a fit and then walked away. Attempting to draw some of the characters from the cartoons, reading some things like Harry Potter or the like, and imagining things in his head filled his time. Whenever he would start doing something important, say homework, or study for a test, he would simply just sit in a chair, lean back and imagine some epic fight he was part of, always being the hero, dying in some supremely heroic way, always to be honored or coming back to life from some unforeseen powers he possessed. It was the only thing he really enjoyed doing. He would have moments of laughs with family or his assortment of friends, but when he was in this world, he could do whatever he wanted. He was in control. Landon cherished control; it was sickening how much he despised being told what to do, not knowing what came next or what to do from the start. He didn't know why, he just did. From a young age, he had an ever occurring inclination to lie, even about the smallest things. It always got him attention, always made him the spotlight of any conversation. This is common among children, younger children that is. His lies were noticed by many; their knowledge of his lies unknown to him however. Through middle school he grew lonelier by the day, increasing his time spent in the controlled world inside his own head and how much he would lie to his own mother and friends. Landon was troubled, and he wanted to milk it for every penny it was worth.

            

Author's Note

looking for comments on pretty much anything. this is an idea for a totally new story (same character name though). *Title is tentative.

Reviews

[Jūdan FyreHeart]

It reads very well as a prologue or introduction to the character. It certainly has potential to be carried on into something much bigger.

[Cafe Reader]

Interesting. Well thought out.

[roarke]

Good character study. Interesting opening, but I don't see the connection drawn to the character yet. Obviously a sketch, plot-character-direction.... I have hundreds of 'em... I'm learning how to keep them around and find stories for them, still working on that.
If the idea grabs you, just keep writing, "go with the flow" when it hits... later, sort the wheat from the chaff so to speak. Sometimes, what you throw away, becomes a story you hadn't realized and what you kept focuses into a direction for your concept and character.
Lots of good stuff here, good imagination and lots of traction in the opening. Keep going with it.

[Mashoosh Kateb]

Its very uncommon for deep folks to lie. They are silent but dont lie very often. If you want to break away from norm then this is a good story. Your character reminds me of Dexter (I have watched only 1 episode). Dont know if you have watched it too. He is very dark, but has a very approachable persona.. he lives a lie but does not compulsively lie to everyone he meets.

[Nobody.]

Dark. Well-written. I like that everyone knows....but he doesn't know that they know. :) Lies are often like that....and it sets the kid up for a mighty fall.
Look forward to reading more.

Cheers!
R.G.