Your Light

You might have been a sigh, or a thin shade.

 

 

 

Was it truly you I've seen,
In a fringe of that lonely realm,

 

Maybe it was you who's been,
Watching while I only tell them,

'He is but one of lean and solid words,
And a beautiful presence..'

 

You might have cast sighs
Of a visiting death dead or
A soft rainfall of crescents

 

But I would not have mistaken, Lord,
The scent of your essence,
Within the distant distort.

 

Never turning to vanish or depart
As my eyes call
Never failing to hear one's heart
As it pants and crawls,

 

Seeking the mirage of your light,
Away from my hollow friends
It pains me to have once arrived
At yet another subtle end,
Of doubt and fright and a new height

 

In a peaceful mist where
Faith and mind,
Would not mend..

Reviews

[Danielle]

Brilliant!

[YouoweYoupay]

Thank you. : ) !!

[Rouillie Wilkerson]

I sense the ice of winter and darkness and lonliness or am I projecting? No. This is nice but I'm prejudiced against pouring outs such as this. I write them as well. ^^

[YouoweYoupay]

Prejudiced against? I didn't get that part..You mean people judge you for writing pieces like this one? Please explain.

[Rouillie Wilkerson]

No, I write in a similar manner and I often wonder if It’s less carefully crafted for the reader and more ‘carefully’ crafted for the writer. This in turn, makes me wonder if such a piece should be revised for reader clarity. Poetry, for me, is still a concept at times. Subsequently, I feel prejudiced towards this type of poetry. And, ironically, partial to it (because I tend to write poetically in this fashion as well). But prejudiced in the sense that I’m not sure if I’m being fair in my interpretation of it – is it the writer or the readers interpretation that holds weight here? Perhaps I’m overthinking it… Overall, I liked your poem.

[YouoweYoupay]

I see what you mean. Both what the reader sees and what the writer tries to make you see are important, i think. Your review had me thinking. Thanks for stopping by. :-)

[afra]

wow amazing write

[Barbara Walker]

"It pains me to have arrived once again, at yet another subtle end" or "it pains me to have arrived, at yet another subtle end". One of these lines is the way I think you meant to write that line.
The words Faith and mind would not mend, re
Nice poem!ally got me to thinking, which is a good thing!

[YouoweYoupay]

I humbly thank you for the review and the corrections. I'm glad you stopped by.

-youoweyoupay

[Sleeping Maiden]

Haunting. I love it. It does remind me of a prayer. We do tend to go find things in faith. =) I love the strength of this. Just lovely. I enjoyed reading this poem!

[YouoweYoupay]

Thank you for the graceful review, Sleeping Maiden. It was a glimpse of a dream I had a week ago, and there was just me and a person emitting a pure light. I wanted them to come closer but they didn't seem to be listening. The gentle, but strong light surrounded that person as they watched me silently from a distance. It was strange, but I found it beautifully spiritual and deeply symbolic. I'm glad you liked my spark of inspiration. Have a good day.

-youoweyoupay

[Sleeping Maiden]

Ohh? wow.. that sounds like a good dream actually. =)
No problem. Keep writing. =)
Thanks for sharing! =D

[Coyote Poetry]

The poem felt like a prayer. We seek to find peace and answers.
"Seeking the mirage of your light,
Away from my hollow friends"
I like the tone and the ending of the poem. Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

[YouoweYoupay]

Thank you for the simple, heartwarming review. It really does sound like a prayer, and I hope He hears it. : )