Quietus

Dreamscapes bursting on canopy-tops

Their intangibility caressing the mind

Sooth my drum, sweet wonder

Water dripping from faults in rocks

The forest sounds trickling into my ear

Whispering to me with its lull

Consciousness drifts I remain awake

Though I am only here in body I rest

Love enters mind once more for you

Feeling the rolling of moisture

every drop reminds me of home

Melting and fusing with branches understory

Here I roost

Reviews

[Ashfallen]

Wow! This is wonderful! "Dreamscapes bursting on canopy-tops!" What delicious introduction to a terrific wordplay. I love the beauty in it, and the nostalgia is deep and wonderful. I love how the mood of the piece permeates me as I flow through it, or it through me. Fantastic piece.

[Bill O. Writes]

So happy you enjoyed, Ash! Thank you for the praise :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

love the imagery here...beautiful...no matter where the body is...we can't really be there if our mind is somewhere else.

[Bill O. Writes]

Thanks a ton for reading Jacob :) and ain't that the truth!

[Frieda P]

You had me with those first two lines...

Dreamscapes bursting on canopy-tops
Their intangibility caressing mind

A bittersweet taste of whimsy, a quiet that still shouts volumes. Love the ending, perfect topper.

[Bill O. Writes]

Another great visit from you. Always loving those reviews! Thank you so much :)

[Lady Glitter]

I like the first line of the 2nd stanza. I can imagine that all of the sounds in the forest would sound like trickling as they found their way to your consciousness. It would seem like only your body is resting there. I like how you describe that though your mind is soaring elsewhere, it is still a form of total rest. Tranquil.

[Bill O. Writes]

Thanks for reading Lady :). Sometimes I wish I could be there. Rain is so relaxing to me. Glad you enjoyed :)

[AprilRN1210]

ooooh, what exquisite imagery teasing the senses, has me drifting to these lush places, hearing the lovely sounds.... I like this side of your writing.. it is "dreamy", sort of bittersweet... your phrasing and use of language is beautiful here... well done... I really enjoyed this one...

[Bill O. Writes]

Thanks April, glad you enjoyed :). It felt different not being direct with my writing, definitely tougher.

[AprilRN1210]

It is good to challenge yourself.. especially when it turns out this beautiful.. well done sir... direct is good and dreamy is as well:)