Obscenity of I

 

 

 

I am what is around me

These people near me

I take a part of them with me

Wherever I may go after

 

I internalize you

Women understand this

They look deeper into your eyes

I am not something separate

 

Or truly intimately connected

To lineage, history, time

But space is intimate, personal

I am what is around me

 

In a collective subliminal sense

We share the same oxygen, genes, sunlight

I read your words as if they

Were my own, came from my own being

 

But my own being is our being

And what I supposed to be an “I”

Was a “we” all along, so in all

This competition for imaginary profit

Am I missing something?

Author's Note

The profiteer-ism of individualism championed by American capitalism has brought us to a pretty dysfunctional social norm of society. That's what you get for following patriarchy and a fake democracy.

Reviews

[Perdition]

I used to watch the faces of the people on the subway and not too many of them had the happiest of looks so I would say that you are at least screaming out from a good darkness..but what of kindness and our journeys? set out for the benefit of all. We are , after all, and in the end, a country and family sharing the same humanity and planet at best and where I go, so travels you come to the end, so when you consider Free Enterprise you must also consider those who work as a family within a business ..all that being said how wonderful it would be to walk a different line and share the outcome and willingness of goodwill for both earth and humanity...you'd think it would be such a simple concept but greed and that struggle over power? So sorry it took me eight years to see this review..and so sorry. Thank you for your voice and patience..lol. Beyond patience, I should say :)

[Closing Thoughts]

I do really enjoy you're poetry. There is something incredibly wise and superior about this piece. It's also slightly haunting with it's conviction. The lines 'I internalize you" and "I am what is around me" were especially my favourites. It reminds me slightly of Walt Whitman's style and his ideas. But this is modern and well written and something I definitely think is brilliant. Thank you for sharing. 100/100

[joshua deathdealer]

I enjoyed this. I'm not a fan of anything that is going on in this country and I do think humanity as whole and most certainly here in the US have forgotten how to connect on a intimate level. Before modern technology we interacted face to face and now the majority of contact is done in that manner. Not good for society I don't think. My handwriting has drastically went downhill since now I input everything through a keyboard of sorts. I don't know but this made me think.. Thanks for sharing.

[Almond Syiem]

An interesting poem with an interesting theme. Made me think: it isn't just about America ins't it?

[ANTO]

I wouldnt say that the US has brought us here because they were mentored directly or indirectly, in the past by the British Imperialists . They too had a fake democracy where class (and its accompanying wealth and keeping the poor down as tax cows with little rights) actually ruled. The same formula is being used again (by corporations) and this time terrorism is to blame (apparently ;p )

Before that there have always been individuals who have driven nations - states - communities - tribes towards inequality and they have been superseded on an endless cycle it would seem throughout history, of egalitarianism. There is an ebb and flow that never ends.
Thank you for sharing this thought stirring writing WP.
:)

[Mai L Nissen]

Interesting focus! Never have we been so occupied with individuality - everyone is a competitor in one way or another... we fight to win, even though the profits aren't necessarily desirable... It is interesting how individuality is mainly practised by being self-absorbed, it is not individuality where you stand for something.

[Vishuddha]

Women are sensitive and impressionable. This has advantages and disadvantages. "I internalize you" might be a pretty naive and dangerous thing to do now days. The male world, the patriarchy, is a safer way to relate to the world at large. The sentiments of this poem are beautifully feminine, touching, emotional. The reasons men cherish and protect us.
This is the dichotomy of our times. Profit is purely of the materialistic world. "We" as an extension of "I" is a projection of the spiritual world. The two don't mix well, don't understand one another. Competition is an integral part of life itself. Makes us improve. Makes us grow. Profit is not the only way to measure who is winning. Mankind is at the end of an age, materialism having been pretty much mastered we can move into other realms. Your time is coming.