Defying Gravity

I let my heart speak

 

One kiss to get this started.

One hug to count it in.

One hand to grab my heart.

One more time to let you feelings slide.

And leave them all behind.

When ever i look to you,

My heart Defies Gravity

Pulling me closer to you.

My heart only beats for you.

So just Take my hand,

Kiss me once,

Tell me the words i wanna hear,

Because my hear defies Gravity for you.

 

 

Author's Note

i don't accually think i spelled Defying right .-.

Reviews

[The Lit Wit]

The start really pulled me in, but some of it seemed a little repetive in the "one more" parts. It also seemed like you could have added more to develop this, maybe instead of, "One more time to let you feelings slide." Reword to something, "Let your feelings slide as our emotions fly side by side." Something to delve deeper into the ideabecause otherwise, it's hard to tell wha you're trying to refer too. Good job though. Good luck!
Melinda

[Dakota]

again its not the best i've done. and i've never had any constructive feedback besides good or amazing or horrable soo....

[Richard McLin]

This is a great piece, the flow I thought was a bit off at first, but I think there was a reason for it. It's starts off one way but then you hear the line about leaving it all behind, so you did with the structure as well, and it changed as the poem did. This is a great piece.

-RIchard

[Hi]

It's really nice poem that has a lot of voice.

[hannah]

It's a creative and sweet poem but after the first few lines, the flow of the poem changed. Just a bit more practice on that aspect of poetry.

[A]

The first four lines flowed really smoothly, and after that, the style immediately changed. You could put a space between the two parts, to make it the same poem, and avoid that minor snag.

Overall though, the word choice was very, very nice, and was written beautifully.

I love you.