My Everything

Kinda meant to be a chorus for a song that I never finished

You are my savior,

You are my dream,

My heaven, my hell,

And the spaces in between.

You are my darkness,

You are my light,

You're the only thing

I think about and

What keeps me up at night.

Author's Note

Comments are always more than welcome!

Reviews

[Lisa Victoria]

I see you meant this to be a chorus for a song. I can feel the melody in these lyrics and hope you will someday finish your song....very beautiful:)

[zainul]

Appears very heartfelt and melodious song.
I think you can expand it in the format of chorus.
I thought the first four lines had great rhyme and melody.
This four lines might make the first stanza.
The five lines following the first four lines might be revised as the second stanza of four lines.
You might omit,"I think about and" and adjust the last line with "You're the only thing".
Please tell me how do you feel.

[Zune]

Thank you for the comment! I really appreciate it. I might work on it a bit more until it becomes a full song, I really appreciate your input.

[zainul]

You are most welcome.
I will wait to see its final look.
Thanks for stopping by.