Billy Mays

So who is this guy anyway?

 

Hi, I’m Billy Mays!

And I always talk this loud

I sell junk that doesn’t work

And it makes my momma proud.

 

Light switches and gooey putty

Little brushes for the john

Oxi-Clean to make life brighter

Do you want me to go on?

 

I could tell of my successes

In the media, TV and such

I’m sure that you have seen me

If you don’t get out too much.

 

My background? Oh I don’t think so

There's nothing much to tell

In truth, my only talent

Is the ability to YELL!

Author's Note

My tribute to Mr. Mays. We will miss his enthusiasm.

Reviews

[J]

All right. This made me LAUGH OUT LOUD! How COMPLETELY annoying is this guy!! There is certainly something more compelling in the fridge ~ smelling of decay.

I love this side of you! Now, I would never consider writing such brilliance ~ more likely I'd just flush the toilet. But this is a groan of discontent that every single breathing one of us w/a t.v. relates to. And you gave me such a giggle of delight! What an incredible mind!

Thank you, D!

Loves,
j

[Winter McPherson]

I heard you reading this on your playlist and it just cracked me up! I can't stand that guy!! LOL!! Very cute.....

[Michael X]

This is lol, because its true, and the force behind billy mays-his ability
is his annoying voice, this is an ode to commercialism thats speaks to the masses,
and really says a statement for our time, humorous satire captured well.
I really liked this, is a fun read.

[An Ordinary Woman]

This is very cool, Dale, very cool. I never would have thought in a million years to post writing [orally] on project playlist. What a fresh and perfect idea. I'm going to listen to more ...

Thanks Dale! I've missed ya!

[Kelly Scheppers]

I ALWAYS hit the mute button....there's just something about his voice that drives me up the wall! Great poem!


; )

[LadyLove]

Ha ha ha ha ha! Geeeeeeeez! That's funny...the last stanza was hilarious! Do another funny one. Blessings!

[Constance]

LOL. I don't know this guy in particular, but there are many like him. Ronco comes to mind. :)

[Emily B]

oh, this is funny! The name didn't ring a bell, but the voice, well that is another matter altogether.

[Kelly D. Burris]

This was funny! I think everyone has seen this guy, and flipped the channel! LOL
This piece flowed and was a very witty piece.
Nice work.

[TL Boehm]

oh it made me laugh too! Smart - funny poetry here, I too wonder who the heck that guy is...He certainly is obnoxious!