On the courtship with time.

Did the shadow of the dagger

creep up from behind?

Did the arrows of desire

pierce the shields of mankind?

Was the envelope of love

just a blanket for today,

while the temptress in a red dress

went on her merry way.

Did the shadow of the dagger

go through your heart now grey?

Did the look of cupid's eye burn

on the love that you tamed?

Did the wheels of time escape you

leaving no trace behind,

while the winds of change have started

on clearing out your mind.

With my hands slipping on the wheels

leaving my time of stay

On the wings of an eagle

I saw night and day,

and the shadow of the dagger

I was unable to say,

I was unable to ....

Reviews

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

Beautifully written. Dark, foreboding, flashing images of a life going by..Insidious Time has no mercy, hence "The shadow of the dagger" creeping. "While the winds of change have started on clearing out your mind"-eloquent, chilling lines.Evocative Dirge-like flow and rhythm with effectively solemn repetition. Last line cut short stops the heart-" I was unable to....." Regrets.... "The end my friend". Absolutely brilliant work!

[andrew mitchell]

Thank you Annette:):)

[Einstein Noodle]

evective repetition of closing lines for each verse ..not always something that works .. but i like it in "On the courtship with time."
1V, 2L "...creep up you..." tho i understand it..seems a little awkward and an easy fix
just a thought for 4V, 2L ..i want to read i was unable to stay (as in stop from happening) instead of say ;)
the shadow of the dagger creeping up my back is chilling ..like the reaper stalking me .. so much to enjoy about this.. going from personal to universal in an easy swipe then back again as desire inflames, pierces and tempts ..i find the intrigue a bur under me saddle this morning..so well done says i!
E.

[andrew mitchell]

Thank you for reading Einstein:):)