Stay a little longer -- a true story

Written upon re-reading http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/AnaPapaya/1796881/

His name was Rob. Someone like him didn't fit in a tiny rural northern hick town in 1986. I am not sure he'd fit in there now. Rob was different. He came from "Toronto" -- people spit that name out like it was a disease back then.

The disdain northern Ontarians have for the big city is something that has to be experienced to be believed. Not only did Rob come from "Toronto", but he wore his hair "weird", like a new age band member. He wore make-up and pink shirts and patterned pants. None of that was remotely acceptable for a guy in that town in that era.

My friend Sue was in love with him. It was fun for myself and my open-minded boyfriend at the time to hang out with someone "different".  Hell, my boyfriend even put some eyeliner on and wore some stylish clothes. No one dared pick on him, he was one of the accepted ones.  With us, Rob had a modicum of protection from the merciless bullies who had moved from me to other targets, including Rob.

The funny thing about the head bully was, she was a very dominant female, who later turned out to be a closeted lesbian. In retrospect it explained a lot about why she picked on certain kinds of women, and singled out men who appeared to be gay, at least according to the conventional wisdom at the time.

The narrow view those small minds took of sexuality singled out a guy who dressed a certain way as gay. I doubt very much that Rob was gay. He might have been bi, but the way he made Sue sing, I am pretty sure he knew his way around the ladies pretty well.  Not that his being gay would justify the behaviours of the bullies. None of the details mattered to them, however. It was the outward appearance that counted.

I remember opening the door to Rob as the bullies chased him. More than one night I thought they would kill him if they got a hold of him. But damn, the boy they called f****t could run a lot faster than they could. We laughed and drank and listened to the idiots howling outside till they got bored and went away. Sue would come over. My boyfriend would come over. In those days my parents were gone a lot and my friends stayed over regularly.

Part of the bullying was a nasty rumour that Rob was a "narc" -- something that could definitely get you seriously injured, even hanging around with the guy. None of us who knew him believed that. There's probably not much worse that you could be labelled in that town at that time than a gay narc.

The four of us were hanging out at Sue's one night, getting drunk and high. The real reason Rob came to our town came out in a flood of tears and semi-coherent sentences. His biological dad lived in our town. Rob had endured countless years of abuse at the hands of his mother and stepfather, and finally, his dad had a chance to set things right.

We were awfully quiet.

Rob got up. He said he wanted air. Next thing you know we were all outside. Sue was screaming. Rob was walking in front of cars, trying to get hit. My boyfriend tackled him. The three of us physically pinned him down. Small towns are strange entities sometimes. I feel like the inhabitants in it really didn't give a s**t if one out of town kid died. No one called the cops. It was just us.

Rob was crying, straining against us. I remember feeling totally sober in that moment, knowing that if we let him go, he may just kill himself. His pain was etched in every movement of his young face. He wasn't rational.

"Honey," I said, "just stay a little longer. If you still want to do it in the morning, when you are sober, no one can stop you."

I know he made love to Sue one last time that night.

He left town without saying goodbye.

Author's Note

Don't. Just stay.

Reviews

[redzone]

I thought I had commented on your Story KL and I did but as part of Papaya's comment... so I won't repeat, just wanted to make my appreciation of this story more "official" ...

redzone

[Lyn Anderson]

Oh, not a problem. Thanks!

[Paul Bell]

Small town prejudice where everyone has to be a clone. And they wonder why they come back with a gun and start shooting people.

[Lyn Anderson]

You got that right. I had dreams of going back there and burning the whole thing down. I left after high school, spent a few unhappy summers there and a couple years after my first failed marriage. Now, I don't even bother to stop in, even though it is on the way to other places I like to visit. I just drive by.

[Philip Muls]

I think we have all known an outlier like that in some way or another. You tell this in an open, straightforward way, it feels 100% authentic. Painful yet very real.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you very much. I appreciate it. I have known too many people who committed suicide over the years, and have done my best to prevent it when I have been faced with it, but at the end of the day, it is a decision made by the person him or herself.

[Philip Muls]

Last week here in Belgium where I live, there was nationwide commotion because an 18-year old boy had been found dead from starvation in a little tent. He had been in institutions until he was 18 and then they 'let him out'. There is a national feeling of guilt which is good. Sad that he had to die for it.

[Lyn Anderson]

That is awful. The more liberal we strive to be, our mentally ill suffer terribly.

[Philip Muls]

Indeed, take care

[Ted Kniffen]

Looking back, we think events could have been changed if we had done something differently. But things happen over which we have little control. A good story, and one I hope worked out for all concerned. A very good story.

[Lyn Anderson]

Thank you very much. Last I heard, Rob was a street kid in Toronto. Hopefully he grew up and made it through.

[Papaya]

It amazes me how small minded and cruel people are.

Still. Still today.

When someone is already vulnerable emotionally, and add to that intoxicated or on drugs, then just a single harsh word, shove or look can push them into doing something that can't be undone.

[Lyn Anderson]

Sadly, things haven't changed a whole lot since 1986. Thanks for the inspiration and the review.

[Papaya]

You're welcome. Yeah, very sad.
Sadder still that the tools available for bullying have become very sophisticated.

[redzone]

a quick visit to WC and I find this "story" from you KL... all I can say is that I felt every syllable, felt every cruel word and activity that Rob faced and tried to deal with.. and felt every sorrow and pain express by you and your boyfriend and Sue... I just want to say S**T, F**K, and puch every single bully and "so called respectable" intolerant person who cannot have any brains...

redzone

[Papaya]

You raise a great point. I think the people who demonstrate willful blindness are as much a part of the problem.

[Lyn Anderson]

In small towns, intolerance is basically to anything new or different. Compound that with a teenage girl who was tough, mean, a natural leader, and very much in the closet, and you have a recipe for hate. The irony is, I am sure her children go through much of the bullying she put us through.