Foster Street - to be continued

Drugs, sex, and abuse...an exploration of my time in a world I want to forget.

THERE WERE NOTES OF TERROR THAT SANG THROUGH THE NIght LIKE A LULLABY THAT LULLED HER awake, RATHER THAN SLEEP. SHE PRAYED FOR CONSCIOUSNESS THE WAY THAT her siblings prayed for VISIONS OF SUGARPLUms. ONE NIGHT SHE FOUND HERSelf HUMMINg INTO HER EMPTY COZY ROOM, HEAT ON 70 DEGREES, and she thought of him.  

THAT NIGHT WAS AN EMPTY NIGHT. THE CRICKETS AND THE WIND fought each other for CADENCE IN THE CACOPHONY OF manchester TRAFFIC. SHE WAS ALONE. AND SHE DID NOT MIND IT. HER THOUGHTS RAN BY THE MILLIONS AS DID THE MANY STRANDS OF HER LONG AUBurn HAIR, TOSSED CARELESSLY ALONG HER SHOULDERS. SHE WAS HER MOTHER’S DAUGHTER. DOLL SHAPED ALMond color eyes sat like pecans on either side of her high chiseled cheekbones, and her full lips looked swollen almost all OF THE TIME. SHE WAS PALER THAN MOST, BUT TANNED SO VERY dark that she avoided the sun so as to AVOID BEING MISTAKEN FOR A STRANGER BY THE PEOPLE WHO should know her face.  

THIS WAS HER CURSE, THIS SLEEPLESSNESS. THIS ENDLESS NIGHT BLENDed INTO DAY, A CONSTant LINGERING OF GRAY AREA. SHE TOSSED AND TURNED INTO WAVES OF SEA MONSTERS AND WITCHES, DEMONS AND ELDERLY WOMEN WITH BLANK STARES AND WHITE HAIR, SHE SPOKE IN VOICES SHE DID NOT OWN, IN LANGUAGES SHE DID NOT COVET. NEVER DID SHE FIND PEACE IN THIS TUMULTUOus Barage of chaotic thought and memory mixed together and junxtapositioned into a patchwork quilt of nightmares. She was her past on repeat.  

 

“shut THE F**K .UP.” 

A MALE VOICE BOOmed FROM THE OTHER ROOM. THROUGH THE SLITS OF HER EYES SHE REMEMBERED WHERE SHE WAS. SHE LAY ON HIS LIVINGroom FLOOR, WRIThing in pain. THE MONKEY ON HER BACK WAS A PET THEY SHARED TOGETHER, A PET THAT WAS ONCE HIS UNTIL HE SNEAKILY TAUGHT HER TO CARRY IT AS WELL. NOW THEY BOTH FED THE BABoon daily, nightly, hourly, achingly and lovinGLy. But never on time. Time was truly the issue.time WAS A MONSTER THAT STALKED THEM BOTH, THREATENING COLD SWEATS AND PUDDLES OF BILE AT THEIR FEET ALREADY SOAKed IN THEIR OWN PISS.THEY COULD NEVEr quite beat time. 

“I’M SORRY, I'M SICK” SHE MANAGED TO CHOKE OUT THROUGH THE GAG and the choke.  

“I’m SORRY..”  

She WONDERED HOW HE COULD BEAR TO SEE OR HEAR HER IN THIS KIND OF PAIN, AND COULDN’T BRING HERself to continue the thought. ThaT WAS A REALITY THAT SHE DIDN’T FEED YET.  

His cries began almost immediately. He whimpered and screamed out in jamaican, REPEATing threats and degredations she ONLY ASSUMED HE KNEW FROM HIS MOTHER’S MOUTH. her BODY TREMORED as she BRACED herSELf FOR THE STORM TO FOLLOW, chairs against walls and furniture across the floor. SHE COULD STILL FEEL THE STING OF WIRE AS HE WHIPPED HER and SHE COWERED AND sobbed. He DEMEANED HER IN A Language she did not know and she cried in a PAIN HE COuld NEVER UNDERSTAND AS FLASHES OF HER MOTHER PANNED THROUGH HER MIND WITH EACH LANDING BLOW. WE MARRY our fathers. We f**k our mothers. 

His howling bellowed through the 1 bedroom APARTMENT, THE BUSTED LOCK ALLOWING The front door to shake and shudder with the landING OF EACH KICK AND FLAIL OF HIS MINDLESS LIMBS. HE WAS A CHILD IN THIS MOMENT, a fragile thing she wanted to love. So SHE WENT TO HIM. KNOWING EACH STEP WAS A RISK SHE STILL EDGED CLOser TO HIS ABSENT BODY, KNEELING TO COMFORT HIM, SOOTHING HIM AS SHE RAN HER FINGERS THROUGH HIS HAIR AND DOWN THE BACK OF HIS MOISTENED NECK. In this moment he was hers. In this moment she was his.  

A KNOCK ON THE DOOR WOKE HIM FROM THIS SLUMBER. IMMEDIATELY HIS EYES BECAME LUCID AND SHE QUESTIONED IF HE HAD EVER REALLY CHECKED OUT IN THE FIRST PLACE. SHE WOULD ALways WONDER IF THESE STATES WERE HIS PLEAS FOR ATTENTION AND AFFECTION, OR IF THE PSYCHOSIS WAS IN FACT, REAL. ANOTHER TRANSACTION FOR HIS POCKETS, SOON TO BE EMPTIed and filled with another dose to medicate reality.   

Reviews

[Relic]

I was a little confused over the incomplete words and those underlined, but this was a pretty scary story. To me, they've both lost their minds with decisions that are more helpless than helpful. Drugs destroy people. Plain and simple.