A Battle for Love

Love is it a fight worth fighting for?

Soldiers armed

With weapons

The bullets are loaded

They march

An army of them

Anything in thier way

Won't see another day

I ran with my shaking legs

I stumble and fall

I then began to crawl

Through long thin grass

I try to hide myself

Their footsteps heavy

They shake the earth

Thier faces full of terror

Unpredictable in thier eyes

Thier helmits rock hard

They don't look heavy

But I bet they are

 

One man spots me

The leader high up on a horse

I hear bangs of bullets

They fly past me but miss me

My ears couldn't take the bangs

The leader screams

He instructs his men to surround me

 

The battle for your love

Oh why has recieving your love,

Turned into a heart pain?

I bet all this battling

Makes your love worthless, empty and weak

When will I earn it

When will you realise this is no game

Of losing and not recieving anything back

I promise I will love you too

 

 

Reviews

[BELLA]

wow you are a rally grate witer nive job

[Dior]

Love it...makes me feel like I am the person being shot at

[LittleMadGirl]

it's really different from other poems, I love, how you managed to make rocking helmets appear in a poem for love
that's really great

[Livana Lowell]

I like the little plea at the end; it emphasizes on the begging of mercy from the crucial points of love. When I think about it, I always envisioned the perfect relationship would involve something like a battlefield. A lot of heartache, fights, and etc. Love is like a battlefield so says Jordin Sparxs. Anyways, I think the diction is on key to me and there's not much I have to say really other than the poem is flows and expresses a relative moral in both life and love. That's why I believe this deserves a hundred for me and a place in my libary. Thank you for sharing.

[Coyote Poetry]

War and bullets in a love poem. That takes great talent. You brought me in with a powerful lead lines and I like the surprise ending. A excellent poem.
Coyote

[nyi]

i know how you described the situation there..very well done indeed..i like this ..

[SimplyDisastrous]

Very realistic. Good job [:

[Dupree]

Now this piece I adore this is great. You are a good writer, I can feel every emotion in this piece.

[Daniel Gardner]

Great poem I like battle poems and you brought that out nicely