Abuse

Bad memories brought back to life. These are memories of my first boyfriend.

Stabbing pain flies up my arm

As you block my circulation.

Why do I say no

When I know you can hurt me so badly?

Why don’t I tell an adult

And get help to become free of this pain?

 

Tears prick the sides of my eyes

As the bruise around my wrist begins to form.

I need to think up a lie

To hide the truth.

If anyone finds out,

He will hurt me more.

 

My friends are becoming suspicious

Because the lies no longer work.

I barely allow you to touch me

Because I’m afraid it’ll do more harm

Than it would do good.

 

You throw the paper at me

And I throw it back thinking it is all a game.

The girl behind me picks it up,

Unfolds it,

And calls you an a*****e.

I take it from her

As relief chills my body.

 

“We should see other people.”

The tears begin to form again

But they aren’t tears of pain.

Sweet relief.

I go to the next class

And release them.

 

My friends think I’m upset

Because you dumped me.

They say that

You asked someone else out

And they turned you down

But I don’t care.

I’m too happy to care.

 

I thought it was over,

But I was dead wrong.

After a short break you return,

Begging me for forgiveness,

Saying that you’ve changed.

I give in.

 

Nothing changed,

And after a week

You are bored with hurting me.

You claim you are leaving

But I know the truth.

Relief sweeps over me.

 

Years pass and I see

How you treat the other girls.

You are soft and gentle with them.

Why was it only me you hurt so badly?

Author's Note

I wrote this so that girls who have been in similar situations aren't afraid to come out and face their abuser. I may never talk to him, I actually avoid him as much as I can, but I know that I have admitted what has happened. I may never be the same because of it but this poem could possibly give other girls like me some hope to get out of a relationship like that or speak up about what happened in the past. Thank you everyone for your kind reviews and support!

Reviews

[Sexy P3nguin]

Amazing poem. Very deep and straight from the heart. I have to say you are very brave to write this and post it for others to see. I respect you very much for that. Like I said it is an amazing poem 100 out of 100
Amazing job.

[Alz Alz]

WOW this was simply beautifully written... So scary though... Absolutely amazing, 100/100 and + to my library. Well written, gave me chills... It makes me feel absolutely terrible for the main character, which is a good thing! You captured this emotion so well... Good write...

[JustWantLove]

Poetry is the soul's means of expressing itself, sometimes in disguise; to write from the deepest pores of our heart is to scream aloud, inducing all negative vibrations to neutralize and cease in our lives; writing with heart and more-so, full emotion and risk, realization and daring, is admirable and therapeutic all at once! Do you know what's the philosophical principle behind suffering? To balance it out with goodness and forgiveness! This piece does that, an emotional ventilation, expressionism and healing! Pour your heart out and be free, Just Be!

[Coyote Poetry]

Someone who hurt you need to keep a distance from. You are lucky to escape the first time. No-one has the right to hurt another. A powerful poem. We must stand our ground. Woman can have great strength also. A powerful and sad poem.
Coyote

[Bexfinch]

powerful it declares hes not urs u should send him pics of u with another boy happy. ; )

[Iota]

Tears of relief are mistaken for tears of grief. I can't imagine the relief you must of felt when you finally got away from him. What an awful cycle to exist in, dreading the coming of each day. Yes, this a sad poem but it is also liberating one for all of this is in your past. Great Write.

[Mai Aliza]

I love this poem by you, it surpasses your shorter poems like the sky surpasses the ground. You should try to write longer poems, from my standpoint they are alot better.

[PoisonedFlower]

you reviewed my work, so i thought i'd do the same for you! and this poem really got me... i've always hated guys who could do that to someone they're supposed to love. it's so wrong, and painful for the person going through it, and you conveyed that really well. i hope it's not from personal experience, though! i really feel for anyone who'd have to deal with that.

[Impulse]

A powerful piece of work. I love the last line, how it stands out is amazing. I hope you're okay...

[melissa]

wow wonderful work!!! the pain and anger really got across great. i really like it:)