The lonely night

This is a poem about the loneliness and aching who lives alone in a desolation after failing themselves, their family, and closest friend.

This night the moon is too low
it only continues to sow
light through the sole window
It shines in darkness that won’t let go
As the wind and wispy clouds flow
They’re struck by the cries of a crow

The hour hands pass by too slow
For the days that have nothing to show
I search through a sky I’ll never know
My heart lays in a melting blanket of snow
As my feverish dreams continue to row,
in a sea of night, continuing to grow

Author's Note

Please help me with grammar, development, punctuation, and structure. Any suggestions or advice is appreciated, and I hope you enjoy this poem!

Reviews

[lizzie]

Hello! Your writing carries a strong emotional clarity, and the flow feels effortless. While reading, I kept visualizing scenes in a comic format.
I’m a professional comic/webtoon artist open to commissions, and I’d love to discuss a visual direction if you’re interested.
Instagram: lizziedoesitall

[PaulAnka]

Do you have any critique or suggestions for me to improve this poem or to develop it a bit better? No pressure but any advice is appreciated. Thank you for your review!