My bleeding heart...

All i am left with after writing this one...are tears, surging pain and aches...feels as thou am watching my own wrists slit through...and bleeding all the way

"He walks towards the door...
bleeding his heart over the floor...
she stands behind watching...
not a single word out calling..."

 

Standing in the rain,
getting drenched to the core,
each drop feeds on my pain,
the wounds afresh and pure...

My eyes they swell with tears,
the heart aches and longs for you,
haunting me were all my fears,
they won over me and came true...

You slammed the door of your heart,
leaving me all alone shattered,
in a fraction of a second, you just tore me apart,
with just thoughts in my mind and unanswered questions scattered...

You say I've changed...

I was never perfect,
but I tried hard to be...

I opened my heart to none,
but with you even that begun...

I was never the kind you wanted...
but now that i am...
you still got me haunted...

 

"numbness still brims over my soul...
blood feels ice cold...
am turning blue...
freezing with the loss of you..."

Reviews

[Fredrick Malkyor]

Dear Barricade,

I can feel the deep depression that is flowing out of the character like a waterfall of pain. No one is perfect, so why does everone try to be. Those who think that they are perfect is only seeing a mirage of their reflected selves. The only thing you can do is to just be your self in this matter.

Your Friend,

Fredrick Malkyor

[QuietPoet]

This was sooo deep. I can feel the emotion all over this write. I can relate to this so much. Nicely written.

[Jean]

I liked the beginning :) Especially the first stanza. But something that made the rest difficult to follow was that the rhyming pattern changed constantly. You need to keep the rhyming pattern the same, or it hurts the poem. :
Fix this?
^_^

[N. N. Grainger]

awesome mate, get what you mean about being alone make you cold exellent way of putting it

[SallyS29]

A well constructed abstract poem that delivers an emotional bang

Exceptionally well done!

[Jason]

Oh, how familiar this place is. The deep dark emotion you pour into this is what makes it so wonderful. Where as, it might be of a darker side of the spectrum, it is from the more REALISTIC side. We all have swallowed the pain that is this work of art. It is just that not all of us have created such a beautiful story from the pain. I really like this; You did a great job. Thanks for sharing.

[Xfaerie corpseX]

holy moly....

ugh i know that place ALL too well..

great write tho!!

it really speaks to the reader.

[Saurin Corvinus]

Great rhythm, and a true sad poetic nature.

[RaindropsRoses93]

this left me speechless, which is hard to do I might add. A beautiful and heart wrenching poem. I love the contrast in colors at beginning and end. I can definitely feel the pain in your words
"numbness still brims over my soul...
blood feels ice cold...
am turning blue...
freezing with the loss of you..."
Definitely my favorite lines, another amazing piece, thank you for sharing.

[emmajoy]

Heart-breaking, tragic... tears and pain just pour out of your words. I feel as if i've walked into a dark secret, trodden into another person's life. Beautifully expressed, fine format.