questions, again.

There are a few questions in my head that I shouldn't expect answers.
But, at the end of the day, I am just a human too.
Behind that fancy glitching screen.

Was everything a lie?
Was I really good for you?
Can I trust any word you say anymore?

And you'll probably run away again,
just like you always do,
To ignore the argument with me.

Something doesn't disappear just because you ignore it.
Did you really think I forgot just because you left?

I'm so ashamed that you can still make me cry,
and that I stopped writing because of you,
the cards I've soiled trying to understand you,
and the coffees I've had.

I'm so ashamed of all of them.
mostly because I can't understand.
Why would someone run away from something they say is good for them?
Or why would someone ever lie?
Why would they knowingly worship the wrong god?
How could someone do this such cruelty?

And I tried everything.
To keep you in my imagination a little longer.
But not enough poems had been written for your ghost to haunt me.

And I didn't have enough inspiration
to go back.