master of your own absence

master of your own absence

Ah how funny darling
now you are there and talking about the absence you created
and I'm in Edinburg try not to hate everywhere because of you

I know sometimes my words cut like an onion
but I took it quite personal the walls you made, blocks you put, secrets you hid

And it's really mesmerizing for me
that you believe you are the only one in the dark
Don't get me wrong, I know there are shades of dark
Sorry, pardon my curiosity but
Do you have any idea how many countries I left this summer?
how many hospitals I visited?
how many times I had to lie?
Those answers doesn't matter
But what matters is
You weren't there
And you were the one who didn't let me be there for you

Oh my selfish darling
why did you assume that I'd be around ready for you to pick me up?
I might be young, poetic, naive and dump but you missed my train many times
How many forgiveness you need?
and I won't wait no more, if you don't mind and please don't mind
because
I don't need your promises
I don't need your excuses, poems or actions
I don't need you anymore, because why would I?

how did you think I was waiting here and hoping you to come?
Did you believe my life stopped and frozed at the time you left, and I would still want with the same heart...
Gosh you're so Godlike and I loved it
I loved the way I can worship to you
I loved your laugh, humour, words and everything...
but you forgot something
I even questioned the God more than once
Self created problem, like the god itself .

And those poems you quoted
wasn't written for you.

Reviews

[Neville]

Thank goodness you are back and back safely .. You probably can't imagine just how many times I hit your name with my mouse trying to gain access and say hi .. I've been trying to respond to your last review for ages .. I also just want to give this particular post the thumbs up and remind you .. whoever let you down or got on your nerves better watch their back .. I know a couple of good hit men who both owe me a favour and big time .. Just holla if you want their numbers .. Bye for now, but don't be a stranger, Neville

[Beren]

Hahaha! You can't believe how much this comment made me smile! Thank you for your kind words and effort of reaching out!
And for your best support with your men!🤣😎
Hope you are doing well! Let me know!

[Neville]

I'm told I'm doing fine .. so I guess I Must be .. 😎👍

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Amazing, how some people think their world is the only one that exists and that other people want so badly to be in it. When we put those kinds of blinders on, we end up very, very lonely.
Desolate feelings are derived from this very honest piece.
j.

[Beren]

Yeah, you are right. It hurts both sides unfortunately, there is not a winner here

[Beren]

Oh and thank you for reading and your comment! Pardon me please, haha! I get a little emotional!