Ending: Chapter Nineteen

Angst, violence, blood, and several gory descriptions. My kind of chapter. ♥

FTOYWGAS: Holy s**t.  I’m so f*****g excited right now that I could die!

CW: This is angsty, bloody, and violent.  Enough said...? 

RF: I started this chapter when I was on like, chapter four?  Lol, I couldn’t wait to start!

[t h e  .  a v a l a n c h e]

[p a r t  .  o n e]

 

This night is too long

Have no strength to go on

No more pain

I’m floating away

Through the mist see the face

Of an angel who calls my name

I remember

You’re the reason I have to stay...

- Pale by Within Temptation

 

Darkness.

 

Sparrow opened his eyes and was shocked to find that his entire body was freezing.  Wondering why, he looked around absentmindedly and realized that he was underneath the snow that covered the ground.  He didn’t remember what had happened, but he knew that he had to get out of the snow - otherwise he would surely freeze to death or get a major case of hypothermia.  He couldn’t afford either of those at the current moment.

 

Then, something else popped into Sparrow’s mind as he began to claw his way out of the frozen snow that now covered the ground.  Where was everyone else?

 

He was completely alone for all that he could tell, buried completely.  

 

Sparrow’s head reached the surface of the seemingly endless snow, and he gasped as he climbed out fully out.  He shook himself to rid his coat of the frost stuck to it.  It was chillier outside than a summer day was supposed to be, but Sparrow assumed that was because he had just been in an avalanche because of... him.

It was his fault, he knew.  Of course it was his fault.  He was the one who assured everyone else that they would be fine, and the one who told everyone that they had to hunt dall sheep today.  The would have never happened if Sparrow hadn't made up his mind.

He took a moment to assess his injuries.  His face was cut in a few places, as he could feel the sting as the breeze hit his face, but that wasn't too serious.  Sparrow was shocked as he took a step forward and immediately felt a sharp pain in his front paw - he must have done something to it when he was being tossed and turned around among snow, rock, and his pack mates.

Then, Sparrow looked up.  He could see only one completely visible wolf - the others were either missing, somewhere else among the snow; or buried underneath the snow.  That one visible wolf was Ash, one of Opaque's pups.

He was bruised underneath his left eye and jaw, and his eyes were shut tightly, his legs stiff and his mouth slightly agape.  The young wolf was lying in an odd position, as if his spine was twisted more than it should have been.  Sparrow's mouth dropped open as the realization hit him - Ash's spine must have been broken in the fall, and he must have been dead.

Sparrow watched Ash closely, his eyes wandering over every part of the young wolf to assess any further injuries.  He found too many to count, and knew that this was bad.  Blood was dripping out of Ash's mouth, spilling over the snow and staining it crimson.  Sparrow thought that he saw his eye flicker, but... no.  That wasn't possible.  There was no way that Ash could be alive, even though he regretted thinking so.

What would Opaque say when she found out?

This was Sparrow's fault.  All of it.

Sparrow limped over to another shape that he saw lying in the snow, only its front leg sticking out.  It was a tan-red color, and Sparrow's throat tightened when he realized... Perhaps it was Sunset.

No.

He heaved a sigh of relief as he saw a hoof attached to the leg as he approached.  It was just a dall sheep, just a wounded, dying, bloody dall sheep.

Sparrow's heart sunk when he saw that it was a calf, just a few weeks old, perhaps.  It was breathing heavily, its limbs beginning to shake as Sparrow came closer, and it let out a distressed whine, as if calling for its mother.  Sparrow stared at the dying calf as it took in a long, deep breath, and its legs stopped shaking abruptly, stiffening and becoming motionless.  It was dead.

Sparrow slumped down to the ground, breathing raggedly.  He had seen death before, obviously.  He had killed before - that was just the normal thing to do in the wild when you were attempting to survive.  But this time... it was different.  He had just seen two animals who didn't deserve to die... just... die.

Sparrow was worried that any wolves lying buried under the snow would freeze to death, or simply die from being buried for so long and having the weight of the snow upon them.  He stood up shakily, looking around, and sniffed the air.  A strong, earthy, metallic scent came to him, which could only be identified as fresh blood which had only been recently spilled.  He could hear nothing and barely even see anything due to his blurring vision, because his head was throbbing and snow was blowing around.

Sparrow didn't know why he started walking, because he knew that there was no use.  Everyone who was unconscious wouldn't live much longer.  The snow was cold, ice cold, which bothered him since some was still clinging to him, clashing with his ebony coat.  Sparrow frowned down at the snow, his heart pounding, and he turned around to continue walking.

Suddenly, he heard a sharp cry, his ears pricking up and his eyes widening.

"No..."

That was what he heard next, and now, Sparrow was concerned.  Whoever was speaking was clearly feminine, and clearly distressed about something.

It was Sunset, and she was hanging her head over, a pool of blood surrounding her.

Sparrow's mouth slowly opened and his eyes narrowed in disgust as he approached Sunset.  Her back was lacerated in several places, and the wounds were immensely deep.  But, she didn't seem to be concerned about that, as she was staring down in pure horror at front right leg.

Sparrow nearly gagged when he looked at her.  Her leg was missing a layer of flesh which looked as if it had just been torn off with a hook.  The wound wasn't very deep, but Sparrow could see more than just blood.  He could nearly see one of her muscles, which if punctured could enable her to run or hunt ever again.  As far as he knew, Sunset would be quite fine with that, but she was helpful in hunts at times.

"S-Sunset," he said slowly, not taking his eyes off of Sunset's injury, "...have you seen anyone else?" 

"No," Sunset said, her amber eyes frozen on her wound as well.  "But... I heard... noises."

"What kind of noises...?" Sparrow asked fearfully, wondering if it was the noise of an animal in distress.

"Well, it was a moaning sound," Sunset said, "like someone was in p-pain.  I'm not sure who it was, but..."  She blinked down at her injury and met eyes with Sparrow.  "We should probably go and find out."

"No," Sparrow told her fiercely.  "I got us into this mess, and you're not walking right now.  I don't want your injury to get any worse."

"Sparrow, you only care about my injury because you want me to be able to hunt," Sunset said thickly, her eyes narrowed.

Sparrow said nothing, and turned away to head towards the moaning sound, which he had begun to hear as well as Sunset.  "Wait," he called back, ignoring Sunset's statement, "where did the noise come from?"

"That way..." Sunset said, gesturing to the left of her. 

Sparrow took off.

He raced over piles of snow and ice, his front paw aching as he landed hard, but Sparrow ignored it and kept going.  The wind was blowing, it was getting darker outside, and he was NOT putting up with an entire night out here... If he didn't find his pack members now, he might never see them again.

Sparrow's eyes burned as he realized this, but he ignored it as the noises of groans and moans became noticeably louder.  He leaped over a pile of snow and came face-to-face with his sister, who was just sitting there...  Motionless.

"O-Opaque," Sparrow said shakily, coming to her side and sitting next to her.  "Ash is..."

"No," Opaque said, her expression straight down towards the ground.  "No."

"But he's..."

"Please tell me it's not true...!"

She raised her head back up, and looked her brother deep in the eyes with pure hopelessness and worry. She hoped he was mistaken - she would normally believe that Sparrow was playing a cruel and twisted joke on her, but this time it was different.

"It's true," was his response. Sparrow felt the unfamiliar sting of tears burning in his eyes, and he blinked them away uncomfortably. He looked at Opaque with sympathy, and she didn't know how to respond to this situation.

Sparrow wasn't upset about Ash. In fact, he wasn't really upset about anyone. The thing that he was upset with was the fact that Opaque had just lost two wolves who were very important to her, and it was effecting him strongly even though he tried to avoid it.

"This can't be happening," Opaque said, her voice shaking.  "It just... it can't be."

"Come on," Sparrow said, trying to change the subject.  "We need to go back to Sunset, and..."

"Sparrow!  Come quickly!"

Sparrow was interrupted by the voice of Sunset, calling his name from only a few yards away.  "I found Hurricane," she said, her voice quiet.  "And... he's..."

Opaque had raced away from Sparrow as soon as she heard "I found," but after hearing "Hurricane," she didn't think that she wanted to come anymore.  She stopped running, but then began again as she realized, This may be my last chance to see him.

Sparrow got there first.

Hurricane was lying down, his eyes fluttering open every few seconds but remaining closed most of the time.  His body was shaking slightly, yet his head was motionless.

"I think he cracked his skull, or some other head injury," Sunset whispered to Sparrow so Opaque couldn't hear.

"What's going on?" Opaque asked, incredibly alarmed.

Sparrow shook his head violently.  "Don't look," he replied. "You won't be able to handle it..."

Opaque immediately rushed to her brother's side, and he quietly rested his head on hers. "I'm... sorry," he whimpered to her, as he felt her start to shake underneath him. "I - I told you not to look..."

He could tell she was sobbing desperately beneath him, her head buried into his shoulder as she started to shake more violently. Sunset hurried over to both of them, and she nudged Opaque gently. "Come on," she said quietly, her face stiff with grief. "You have to be strong..."

The three stayed there for longer than they had intended to, but they need what would lie ahead. There were probably more wolves that were seriously injured or dead. Taking a shaky breath, Opaque looked up quickly at her brother and Sunset. "I've already lost Ash," she sobbed, shaking her head. "I can't lose H-Hurricane too!"

"You won't," Sparrow said shakily. 

Finally, Sunset heaved herself up, a more confident look on her face. "We need to keep going," she said bravely, her voice cracking. "We c-can't stop now."

Sparrow nodded slowly, gently moving away from Opaque. "She's right," he said quietly. He swallowed. "Sapphire doesn't even know yet... That we're all... So..." He broke off.

Sunset quieted him. "Don't say that," she growled fiercely. "We are going to find them, if it takes us hours."

"We don't HAVE hours!"

Sunset looked shocked at Sparrow's sudden outburst, but she nodded slowly after-wards. "...Come on," she responded softly, helping Opaque stand and staring down at Hurricane.

For some reason, he was saddened at the fact that Hurricane probably wouldn't make it.

~ ~ ~

"Sapphire..."

The grey-and-white she-wolf looked up quickly after hearing the approaching wolves coming over to her.  She had been staring down at the snow, hopelessly lost out here.  The wind was blowing too hard for her to catch the scent of anything.  All she could smell was blood.

"Sparrow," she said weakly, standing up.  Sapphire saw Sunset, Opaque, and Hurricane as well; Hurricane was dragging himself across the landscape with Opaque worriedly looking down every now and then. 

Sparrow sighed.   "Hurricane's injured," he said as bravely as he could, trying to ignore Opaque's sob. "And... Well..." He coughed uncomfortably. "Opaque's not doing so well."

He cleared his throat gingerly, and looked down at his sister, who had thrust her head back onto his shoulder again. "But anyway... We can't give up now. We've already come too far."

"Yes, and we lost." Opaque suddenly broke in, staring at her brother fiercely through her tear-filled eyes. "The avalanche... It... We couldn't handle that. Why n-not give up...?" She stifled a sob at the end, resting her head back on Sparrow's shoulder. In response, he tilted his head to the side so it would meet with hers, and she suddenly jumped up. "I wish we would have never c-came out here today," she growled, now angry with herself. "This would have never happened...!"

"That was my fault," Sparrow said flatly. "I... I knew it wasn't safe, but..." He swallowed. "All that I cared about this morning was my own safety, and my own needs. Because I was starving, I got the idea that we should hunt. And that was the w-worst mistake of my life. But... Now I see that I shouldn't have been so selfish and uncaring." He didn't even attempt to stop a tear from falling slowly down the side of his face, hitting the ground abruptly.

"Sparrow, you need to stop blaming yourself for everything," Sunset pleaded with him. "Please... It's not doing you any good. It's only making you miserable, which in turn makes US miserable."

"Exactly," Sapphire said softly. "When you blame yourself, I feel so horrible because you end up talking about it for weeks. Like, the fire. When you were blaming yourself in the healer den back with me and thought that I would d-die, I felt terrible. Don't let things get to you so easily."

"I didn't before then," Sparrow muttered. "Before that time in the healer den, I had never felt like that in my life.  It just... wasn't me."

Opaque had finally became quiet, and it was so sudden that all of them ceased their talking and looked in her direction to see what she was doing. As before, she looked horrible and overpowered by grief, but now she was silent and appeared a little bit stronger. There was a determined frown on her face. "Well, I'd love to stay and talk about Sparrow being emotionally unstable for three more hours, but I think we should find everyone else," she interrupted.

Sparrow would have hit her if their current situation wasn't so critical, so instead he chose to ignore her comment about him being "emotionally unstable." "She's right," he said quietly. "We should keep looking for others."

Sapphire nodded quietly, walking over to the left further from where they were standing. "The bear sounds came from over there. Then, they stopped and came from further east. I think we're safe..."

"B-bear sounds?" Sparrow said weakly.

"Yes..." Sapphire replied.  "The same bear, possibly."

"We are SO dead," Sparrow said stiffly, looking at the ground in disgust.

"Don't say that," Sapphire growled.  "Just because it has found us once again does not mean that we are dead." 

"This must be what hell is like," Sparrow muttered under his breath. He slumped to the ground, knowing that there was no way they could survive the bear if it came. His left shoulder blade was now aching and stiff, throbbing every now and then. He hoped he hadn't broken it. Sparrow growled in pure anger that this had just happened, after what he already experienced just in the last hour. His eyes stung with frustrated tears, and he looked up at the four surrounding him helplessly.

"We need to find shelter," Sunset said.  "We can't stay here...  And we need to find the others."

"Everyone is gone," Sparrow said flatly. "They've got to be dead. We found no one." His voice cracked. "I should have never taken you out here...!"

Opaque, bleeding profusely like the rest of them, came to her brother's side. He rested his head on her shoulder and stayed there. That was it. It was over. He was finished with this. It wasn't like they would survive, anyway.

Author's Note

:D I'M SO FUCKING HAPPY. ♥ This chapter was so damn fun to write 8D And it wasn't THAT long... or angsty... or gory... or... yeah. xD But tell me what you thought, and please don't kill me...
It was originally longer, where I was going to make the bear attack them and the whole "this must be what hell is like" thing would fit in better. But I wanted to include that scene, and... yeah. xD So, I added those paragraphs, and got rid of the bear thing. That would be too cliche and they would die. o.e So... Yeah...

Reviews

[r]

OHMYGOD!!! I wish I would have got here like an hour ago when you actually posted C19, but oh well. At least I wasnt an entire day late. o.o

I DONT KNOW WHAT THE F**K TO SAY. I AM SO SPEECHLESS. I mean, you always write so good and you are an amazing writer and I love your writing, but this was just so... just so amazing. And breathtaking. And beautiful. It was so sad and........yeah. I dont know. It was just such a QUIET chapter, and so beautiful for some reason. I dont know why; it's hard to explain. But I loved this chapter so much. It was more than what I expected, not even what I expected. I expected so much more... I dont know. I guess I expected it to be rushed with a whole bunch of gore and action, but it wasn't and thats what made me love it so much.

And I love how Sparrow blames himself for everything. He has such a guilty conscience. It's awesome. Poor Ash! I MEAN SERIOUSLY, D****T. T^T I NAMED HIM, AND THEN YOU...YOU F*****G KILL HIM! YOU B***H MURDERER B*****D. Lmfao, Im kidding. I think its funny that you killed him actually. xD Now all she has it girls. LOLOLOL. And F**K ME, HURRICANE ISNT DEAD. T^T FUCKFUCKFUCK, I WISH HE WAS F*****G DEAD!!! But at least you didnt but Sapphy in a whole bunch of danger. In fact, she hasnt really been in the book since the fire and all that drama. o.o

I WONT KILL YOU CAUSE I LOVE YOU. IM JUST GLAD SUNSET DIDNT DIE LIKE BLIZZARD DIED. I STILL HAVENT GOTTEN OVER BLIZZ'S DEATH. ITS KIND OF HARD TO FANGIRL OVER A F*****G WOLFGHOST YOU KNOW. T^T NOT FAIR, NOT FAIR, NOT FAIR. BUT AT LEAST SUNSET IS ALIVE. I LOVE HER AND I CANT WAIT 'TIL MARCH 31ST FOR HER BIRTHDAY. YAYY.

It's okay that you didnt have the bear attack them, 'cause that's what I was expecting to immediately happen as soon as they mentioned the bear being nearby. But I actually like it not attacking them...yet. Yeah, it would be cliche. xD And not all of them could die cause then you couldnt have 45 chapters of dead wolf ghosts roaming around. o.e Lmfao.

Um... Oh! I love when Opaque sort of recovered and she said ""Well, I'd love to stay and talk about Sparrow being emotionally unstable for three more hours, but I think we should find everyone else"" it was funnnnyyyy! I love her, hehe. "this must be what hell is like" made me giggle insanely too for some reason. o.O I dont know why. Im just fucked up in da head. YAY.

IMSOHAPPYIMSOHAPPYIMSOFUCKINGHAPPY!!!! I CANT WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER AND SEE WHO THE F**K ELSE DIED!!!!!! Oh, and I loved the way that Opaque buried herself into Sparrow's shoulder. It was so cute! Um. Was there more that I could say? Probably yeah, but this review is already better than the one you gave me. Lol, I kid, I kid. :D

But I have to work on my C21 before you post your chapter 20! I HAVE TO STAY AHEAD OF YOU D****T. ...o.O Lol. I LOVE YOU FOR POSTING THIS BUT YOU SHOULD HAVE POSTED IT LIKE A MILLION DAYS AGO. AND BY A MILLION I MEAN LIKE TWO. :D [NH]. ...I think that's all I feel like saying, but hurry up with C20 please so I can see if Moon is still alive. xD And Opaque's other cubs. And if da bear goes RAWRRRR. :D

[halflives]

OHHELL. I THINK I'M IN SHOCK. The medics are going to have to get the paddles. Either that, or I'm having a flipping seisure.

OH. MY. GAWD. That was fawking amazing. Cheezit's review says it ALL but... YES.

BEST. CHAPTER EVER. Poor Ash and Sunset. GAWD NO, SUNSET DIED ON SHIZZLE NOES NOES I THINK IMMA DIE. D: NOESNOESNOES.

*goes into a state of shock*

[נнα&p..]

S**t.

-.-

They stole my words. Again.

I LOVED THIS SO DAMN MUCH. I LOVE THIS CHAPTER, AND THIS BOOK, AND HOLY S**T, I'M GONNA CRY IF I READ THE NEXT CHAPTER. THIS ONE ALMOST MADE ME CRY LIKE 40 TIMES BECAUSE SPARROW'S SUCH A DAMN PESSIMIST. -.-

I LOVE YOU.

READING ON NOW. >=3

[Rayne~Drop.]

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESHHHHHHHHH! I. F*****G. LOVE YOU. SO MUCH. RIGHT NOW. YOU POSTED IT TODAY! YAAAAAAAAAY! XD ...Okay. Enough spazzing out. o.O XD

Okay. First. Again, I love you. Um...Hurricane IS gonna die/is dead...Right? Because if he's still alive the makes me sad. -.- OHMYFUCKNIGHADES. The detail. Amazing. It gave me the chills and I loved it. I love how Opaque can still be all like,"Well, I'd love to stay and talk about Sparrow being emotionally unstable for three more hours..." Tha twas fummeh. The bear's still alive? ..>Well then. F**K. Yeah..>Sparrow's ruight. They are all screwed/dead....Huh....Can't believe you killed Ash...Sunset's wound sounds nasty. o.O Well...Again, on the bright side, as you've stated ,SHE WON'T HAVETA HUNT ANYMORE! XD ...I'll leave some shiz out so Cheezurt and other pplz can't call me a review stealer...Or that much of one. FUNISH NOW DAMNIT. XD

...F**k/ Nevermind...I ddin't see Cheezurt already read... hehe. ^^' ...Ehh...