Grandad: When I Was A Little Girl

Poem about my childhood with my grandfather and his struggles

When I was a little girl, I used to climb into his bed
In between him and Grandmom-I'd lay down my sweet head

 

I felt so secure- so right to sleep I fell
I'd wake up and eat breakfast-I knew all was well

 

As the day went on, I would play with my toys
I didn't have any worries-not even with boys

 

He'd come home from work-I'd see him walking down the street
Sometimes I'd run down the street-so Granddad I would meet

 

He'd walk into the house-he's give me $.50 pieces
I was so ecstatic-for I could hardly believe this

 

But as I got older some things started to change
I looked out my mind's window and so no sun-only rain

 

I woke up one morning to go climb into his bed
But my mom said, "Don't bug grandmom"-so to her I said

 

"Why did you say that?"-as I started to cry
For she never said that before-and I didn't know why

 

But what she told me next made my body grow weary
She said, "Granddad got hit by a car last night"-do you know how scary

 

That was for a little girl at the age of about eight?
Was this supposed to happen?-Was this my Granddad's fate?

 

Everyday we'd go to visit him at Polyclinic Hospital
I couldn't stand seeing Granddad like that-so helpless and vulnerable

 

Then finally he came home-though things weren't the same
Nor would they ever be-but who was to blame?

 

We took it day by day-fell into another routine
But I still wished I was aleep-and having a real bad dream

 

What happened next made my heart take a leap!
Our lovely home at 2327  North Sixth Street...???

 

Got caught on fire-we lost mostly everything
Now this little girl wondered what the next day would bring

 

But time went on-we recovered, but never to forget though
I guess all things happen for a reason-so there's no need to complain...so....

 

Life went on-Granddad was still in a wheelchair
And he was always asking us to play in his hair

 

He'd joke around with us-but sometimes he'd cry
Lying in his bed-probably thinking about old times

 

Feeling sorry for himself-but who could honestly blame him?
Speaking the truth-the answer is no one

 

Because we have no idea how much pain that he suffered through
All we could do was just be there-for what else could we do?

 

But next we found out-my dear old Granddad had cancer!
Now I was praying to God for Him to give me some answers!

 

My Granddad was now terminally ill
Talking out of his head-but yet it still

 

Didn't dawn on me-that he'd be gone in a few months now
I said, "Hell pull through like always"-now how did I sound?

  

Back to the hospital-still talking out of his head
Oh how I wished I was that little girl-so I could go climb into his bed

 

To lay there and fall asleep-and to wake up feeling happy
Playing outside, and seeing Granddad waving at me

 

Coming home from work-walking down Sixth Street
But that was never to happen again-for the cancer had him beat

 

Before Granddad passed on-I talked to him all alone
I said, "Don't be scared to die, for God's gonna take you home"

 

I told him we'd be ok, and that we'd take care of Grandmom
I knew he heard me talking-though he didn't respond

 

Other things happened-but too much for me to get into
January 25th granddad passed-now how do I explain what I went through?

 

I think it hurt me most to see my mom and grandmom upset
It hurt me to see my aunts-with their eyes all wet

 

I really didn't know at this time, how I was feeling
But the day of his funeral-is when I really started dealing

 

With his death-it happened as soon as I saw him
For I was used to seeing Granddad in a bed-but NOT in a coffin!

 

But I do thank God, He took my granddad out of his misery
But now when I go to Grandmom's-it's Granddad that I see

 

But I know it will get easier as time goes by
Even though I'll never forget him-I know sometimes I will cry

 

All I want to say now is-"I love you so much, Granddad"
And I'll hold on to the happy memories-and try to let go of the sad

 

But I will especially remember-when I was a little girl and used to climb into your bed
In between you and Grandmom, I'd lay down my sweet head

 

Written by: LaTanya Scott