until somebody falls

Reverting back to a childlike rhythm helps to relive things in a less conscious way. I tend to do this a lot in writing, but then save it away without sharing. It's a therapy of sorts for me.

daddy made her think this way
it's not her fault at all
mommy says it's all okay
until somebody falls
but now he's gone
he'll drift away
but she still scares me sometimes
when she thinks that way
her temper's short
she snaps so quick
"i'm sorry i--"
"shut up you prick"
but suddenly she took his place
he's gone, she's here
she rules the house
with pain and marks and fear
but when i'm older
granny says i'll stay
with her sometime
some other day
she says she's sorry
i don't know why
but then she hugs me
and i just cry

Author's Note

I fully appreciate reviews, especially when they tear apart my work in an attempt to make it better. Rip, tea, break it down. Tell me how you do not like it, how to make it better. I want your opinion. Truly.

Reviews

[P.S.Chance]

I really enjoyed this and I thank you for sharing. I see daddy morphing into 'her' (your sister?) and it's scary.

[Michael]

I like how you leave the duality of abuse less defined and more suggested. It forces the reader to accept it with their own historical references. I am not the biggest fan for free-form poetry but this one really works well and fits the staccato nature of emotions.

Well done.