please

i just couldn't breathe
they were entering me
a tube down my throat
kept in my screams
while a bag at the end
stopped my hyperventilating
my wide eyes captured
each ray of bright light
as they held my shoulders
and begged me not to fight
sharp pains in my chest
as hope drained out my eyes
my last whimpering plea
was please, i don't really want to die.

Author's Note

I fully appreciate reviews, especially when they tear apart my work in an attempt to make it better. Rip, tea, break it down. Tell me how you do not like it, how to make it better. I want your opinion. Truly.

Reviews

[Michael]

OK, I have to throw the flag! Flag on the play! you cannot post something like this and not give us the back-story!! It is a really strong work and is full of emotion. We can feel the fear and desperation of the moment.

Very nicely done!

PS: the good news is getting a flag on the play is good, means we want more.