i wonder...

I WONDER …….7.4.2011

 

I wonder

if the side of my finger

down your glistening back

makes any sound

that can be felt

by you?

or me?

 

I wonder

if the brush of my hair

across your shining face

makes any sound

that can be felt

by you?

or me?

 

I wonder

if a waft of my perfume

thru’ your private space

makes any sound

that can be felt

by you?

or me?

I wonder?

Reviews

[Revery]

This is deceptive in appearance. It appears cute and simple but is incredibly complex and unique. The word combination of feeling a sound just alludes to something so subtle but real. After all sound can be felt but often not sensed by most that are not sensitive enough to perceive. Therefore to be so tuned into a lover that every cue or sense is keenly aware is a wonderful thing to write about. I would hope that this is all you intend with this because I am just floored that such simplicity can represent this.

[Blue Ivory]

Interesting...I like your style. It makes me wonder. I'll definitely be thinking about this for the rest of the day :P

[Nautili]

This is lovely, the simple gestures that leave such a deep impression, the sweeping of the hair, the touch of a finger.... and the inhaling of someone's fragrance....very nice indeed.

[Priscilla Sayers]

Such a beautifully created piece. I love the depths in the questions, the complexity in the wave of thought you weave through each stanza. You create the actual sensation of the senses vibrate through space to show how the senses can be come more acute when the love is deep between too people, or even just an intense attraction, simply beautiful!

[Ed Hart]

i can hear all the way over here

[Emerald Seas]

Exquisitely intricate in its simplicity.
Revery's comments are superb. Your writing get the reader thinking - deeply - and that is always a good thing. Well done!