the Creak

old house makes noise

creaking of the floor boards

and old troll that hoards

in between the cracks

of her dilipidated shack

buttoning up her blouse

from her visit from the louse

named Ted Anderson who has a wife

and kid, lives up the block in a ranch style home up the block

Reviews

[Water_the_Sun]

Im not a hugeee fan of the repetition in the last line but i think that removing it would take away from the effect of the write. It makes it sound nervous, and regreatful, but at the same time satisfied... in a strange way...

This poem displays guilt and self loathing and that feeling of being stuck, so well. Ive never been in said situation but i know several friends who are, and this sounds like them, its so sad, but sometimes they dont even see how much it hurts...

[wolfshrew]

i have always wanted to write things about affairs