One Last Breath

What happens when you cannot write?

When you can only sit and feel?

Emotions running wild in your head

Your mind spins like a hamster’s wheel

 

What happens when there’s no release?

When the pain of life just builds

Like murky waters rising with no remorse

Seeking to drown your waning will

 

What happens when you reach that breaking point

And there’s nothing you can do

But watch the world keep spinning ‘round

While no one truly cares for you?

 

And what happens when you finally lose

The battle of your fading life?

When you feel your heart slowly giving out

So you give in    one last breath    then take the knife.

Author's Note

I decided I shouldn't have to post an explanation after each poem. Each person can interpret it how they wish and if anyone wants an explanation of why it was written, they are more than welcome to ask me.

Reviews

[Tommy]

You know I often wonder how long I will last. I suffer from Bi polar, and at times I don't think I will make it another day. I thank God that so far I have been able to hold on to His strength, because if it were not for him I would not be here. This is a great write, I love the pieces I can relate to the most, and this one hit home!

Nice work!
RLG,
Tommy

[Miss Coral]

Great piece-- I liked the questioning, the emotions underlying every word. Excellent job.

[J.Black]

"What happens when you cannot write?
When you can only sit and feel?
Emotions running wild in your head
Your mind spins like a hamster’s wheel" ..... yes! I feel you! What GREAT imagery of how a mind races around and around! And my god you write so powerfully! I love the last line, it's like a do-or-die type of thing. Even when you hang on for that one last moment, it's still not enough because your going to sacrifice it anyways. Well penned!

[The Analog Kid]

We all feel this way at times. Nice way of capturing the feeling. I like how you write about not being able to write:)

[MissWordSmith]

fantastic imagery as usual, but i feel like you need to polish up the flow a little, up to your usual standard. :)
great ideas, still...
stay away from those knives.. :P