Without you

Watching one of my fav shows... wrote some stuff for fun

This is probably a little past due,

but as I keep waiting for time

to heal these wounds… I only find

myself still missing you.

 

I know I was so far from perfect,

No matter how hard I tried…

I could never find happiness... yet it

kills when I see tears in your eyes.

 

I never wanted to hurt you,

Only a chance to love you.

But the harder I tried the 

farther away I pushed you.

 

Maybe I was never good enough.

 

So I found ways to cope and to

be happy momentarily… never

realizing the path of destruction

and heartbreak I would leave behind.

 

Maybe the world will be a better

place without me… I’ll never know.

What I do know is that I’ll never

be a better “me” without you.

Reviews

[modtoddinc]

Poignant piece. The pain and loss of relationship; something every human being experiences. Here you have captured its essence. The pleasure and pain, the truth and blame, elegantly written and evenly delivered. A wonderful poem from an excellent poet. Thank you for rr, and sharing your art.

Peace, Todd

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Todd... sorry for the late response haven't been on much buddy.

[Michele Harman]

This was really good, its something that every person can relate to. Loosing someone when a relation ship ends. Often times people don't understand how you feel after a breakup but this just touches it perfectly

[DoormanDan]

Man, those last four lines struck an emotional chord! I think this might just be my favorite piece yet out of all your works, Aaron. It delivers a message known by most people in the world in an emotional way that is relatively difficult to attain, and that makes it stand out amongst others like it. Superb job, my friend! :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thanks buddy! It seems like a lifetime ago that I wrote this piece... been in a non-writing state for a while now. It will come back hopefully :)

[DoormanDan]

Trust me, it will eventually come back so long as you still like to write. I've just gotten completely out of a writing rut that started at the end of last summer. It just takes time and inspiration. :)

[Insight "MH"]

Pure passionate feelings, the way you express those lovely feelings is an extraordinary way. Well done my dear friend. :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Insight :)

[Aries1984]

For some reason the last verse of this poem really reminds me of the song Pride's Not Hard To Swallow. In particular the last two lines. What I like about this piece is that it really shows how when we think that we are doing good for someone else, when we think that we are protecting them from hurt, it's not always right sadly.

[AaronFreitas]

I will have to look them up don't think I've heard of them before. You make some good points, I'm glad you understood the meaning of it :) It's gotta be that Aries connection :)

[Nani Mino]

nece poem. you are really sensitive because the words are deeply coming from the bottom of your heart

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much... yeah I'm a softy haha... appreciate your comment :)

[sarah jane]

I feel like I've felt like this before.
This piece is so relatable & has so much emotion in it. Thank you for sharing this with us.

[AaronFreitas]

Thanks for your review my new friend :) I tried my best to find exactly what I was feeling and share those emotions... I'm glad you liked it and sorry you've felt it before. Appreciate your review :)

[armin]

This one is well penned, strong and emotional. I could feel the pain, top to bottom good work.

Armin. ....

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much armin :)

[armin]

your welcome I loved the final lines, moving ...

[Obscured by the Shadows]

I can relate to this on a very emotional level. The amount of pain that can be caused by relationships like these is immense and terrifying. You have perfectly described it here. Excellent detail and explanation, all in all, a very nice piece of writing. You've astounded me once more.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you my friend... I think I could write about the pain of heartbreak and failed relationships every day. The feelings linger and wounds have not healed. I appreciate your kind words :)

[Obscured by the Shadows]

And I appreciate you sharing out your experiences and feelings, lets people know they aren't alone.

[Ms. Twitch]

I can relate to this in many levels; beautifully captured. Thank you for sharing this, I enjoyed reading your piece.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Gloria :) I'm glad you could relate to it :)

[Southern_Writes]

Wow dark and painful. A strong piece of heartache and acceptance of flaws and mistakes.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Kansas :) Yes indeed... mistakes linger in the mind for eternity no matter how much we try. Thanks new friend :)

[Southern_Writes]

Your welcome hun