Beaded Tears

Title pretty much says it!

Beaded Tears

A teardrop weaves its way down my cheek

A frozen beaded, transparent

A salty trail left behind

The only evidence of my sorrows

The planet infested with life

I’m not alone

Another soul is

Crying a beaded tear

A necklace we could make

A lace to strangle those who caused this hurt

Author's Note

A sweet poem and then BAM! a surprise ending! Tell me what you thought!

Reviews

[Steph's_romantic_myster..]

I think your right, very sweet with a twist of lime at the end, such a powerful read and good content... I have one recommendation, on the second line you might want to change the word beaded to bead. It flows better and causes the rhythm to remain consistant. Try it outloud first. It sounds better. The poem is Excellent either way, and you are a terrific writter and a great friend!!!!!!

[Jonathan De Elvira]

it's impressing how a simple would have so many stories in them and so many thoughts and meanings...good job

[G. K. Bostic]

What I might have said as a review, you've already said in your author's note. So, I will first of all agree. The 2nd line of your poem may need a minor change....at least I found it disconcerting. It seems it should either have a word after transparent (tear? drop?) or the article 'A' should be removed from the beginning of the line. With 'A" at the beginning it begs for a noun at the end to me. That being said, I love your idea and the way you've expressed it. Tears strung together as a necklace to strangle......wow!!! Fantastically creative!

[Theodore]

haha a good one I can relate to some of writings keep up the good writing.

[underwriter]

very good write! your comming out of your emotional shell a bit!! i like to see it, even tho the content is sad, its powerful! well done!! keep it up!!

[hannajade]

aha, I like.
Great poem! 100/100

[Kelsie Eileen Stark]

Brilliant!

[Ashley Myers]

haha i think this is really good. i like your ending!!!!!

[SOUL LESS]

An improvement certainly...in thought at least. On the whole a very nice poem.

[Jim Parson]

I find this to be very clever! The image of tears being fashioned into a garrote is really very ingenious. And the twist works perfectly. When I read this, "John Tucker Must Die" popped into my head...it was one of my daughter's favorite movies when she was younger. Well done, Chelsea!

[Coyote Poetry]

This is a amazing poem. Started soft and easy. Then ending with the hope of a strangling. A outstanding poem. I like it.
Coyote