Memories

Like a cradle being rocked by a caring parent.
Like a windmill going round and round.
My mind is swayed and uneasy.

As avatars of sorrow and joy clash,
Fighting due to their ethnic diversity,
Cavalrymen of despair pierce my heart.
With their javelins of woe.

You've let them in.
By going away and leaving the gates open.
But behind you leaving no trail.

Soon on a new path I'll embark,
Preferably one with blooming trees,
But you'll still leave a mark;
You'll become memories

Author's Note

My first poem on this site I hope for harsh critics

Reviews

[d.haze]

Znas ko sam pa mogu pisati na crnogorsko-srpskohrvatskobosanskom right?
Rekla sam ti vec da mi se ovo svidja, sad cu ti to i javno ovdje reci, doduse malo detaljnije.
Svidja mi se jer me podsjecas malo na edgara alana poa, u nekim djelovima, ali opet zadrzavas svoj stil sto se jasno da primjetiti. Ono sto ti nedostaje i sto malo 'strci' jeste upravo neka zvucnost pjesme, njena melodicnost. Vidi se da ti fali malo tog 'zanatskog' djela dok pises, ali sigurna sam da ces to steci prije ili kasnije.preporucila bih ti crnjanskog, i kisove analize crnjanskog, if i may :):):)
zvucim pretenciozno za nekog ko ne umije da pise nista vise od fanfikcije ali poznajemo se tako da yolo wtp todor fighting!

[reetu]

Excellent poem and I liked a lot of your describing touch and metaphors.

[Cody Jeremy Thompson]

Thank you im glad you liked it

[reetu]

If you post something more someday, I will gladly read them.

[Cody Jeremy Thompson]

Well I'm planning on publishing more stuff in near future but for now on they are just drafts.

[anabelee]

WOW
Finally someone who actually puts effort in their stuff. Its beautiful. Simply. It brings you into the writers mind, into a completely another universe. Dark, melancholic but with a glimpse of hope in the ending.
Good work and keep it up..

[Cody Jeremy Thompson]

Heh I'm glad you liked it and yeh I'm going to try n write more often

[Cornelius]

i like the first 2 paragraphs but you lost me after. Continue to share