(hate me if you want, but support me if you care)

the struggle catches me, and i realize i have nothing.
many people don't notice, and for the longest while i was glad. I live(d) in fear, my restrictions are constantly on my mind and I wonder what makes me so different. The answer is simple though. I wasn't born here. So I'm not documented, to many I'm "illegal". So what then? I don't exist to the government, I'm classified under so many stereotypes. I'm called and refereed to as so many things.
My dreams have suddenly become something I will not be able to obtain. I don't qualify for federal aid, can't legally drive, can't get a job. The list goes on and on.
I am signaled, pointed to, and told I am worth less than a human being. I am told I am "illegal". I am told to go "home", but where is that? I've lived in the United States since I was two. I was a 4.0 student, but ever since I found out I can't attend a university due to cost, and I can't obtain a job to pay...my grades dropped.
At some point I remember being suicidal, still am sometimes. I always fear being deported and going to place i don't know, going yet to another place where I am unwanted.
I'm tired of living in fear, I'm tired of being taken advantage because of my legal status. I'm tired of having the constant worry. I'm tired of the life I lead, just because of the lack of a paper.

I want to make a difference, I want to help people...but can't even help myself.

Many people wonder why I just don't apply for citizenship, truth is it's not that simple. I have no way of applying for that, I'm not lazy I've looked into it.
So, everyone, I'm a DREAMer. I have nothing going for me now because of this, other than the dreams I might never accomplish.
It's sad though, how I'm so restrained, chasing the American dream, I feel American, lived here since I can remember...but I'm nonexistent and worthless to many, and the government.

But I know, now, I must continue with my life...suicide is not an option if i want to help people...I must overcome this, I must face this fear, face the haters. I want people to stop committing suicide over things like this, because I know we all feel so alone. Sometimes all we need is someone to listen with out judgment and a hug.
So here's to everyone who is like me, "impossible is nothing."

Stay strong, follow your dreams, and keep your head up, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

charlie <3

Reviews

[Lexi Villanueva]

Asome i love it

[falling_toxic_rain]

Thanks.

[Lexi Villanueva]

your weclome its very creatively write in tis own way

[Distant horizons]

(((HUG)))