hum

listen to the air hum around you

the house is quiet

but not all asleep

the world hums soft lullabys to the sky

and i sit

tap tap taping

at my numbness

happiness floods me through the day

then i escape

to my cave of imagination

oh silly writers lift your voices

oh silly lovers

shift your eyes

im naked in this sentence

bare

a skeleton

a pile of meat

but do not decieve yourself

for this is all materialistic

one day i will float

through the heavens of memory

Reviews

[EMF]

I love the dark beauty in your work. It has a quality about it that is both stunning and threatening. A great trick when you pull it off well, and you do pull it off, extremley well. It leaves visual images in the mind that are to be dwelt upon later. Stunning poem/story. The slash, because it works so well on both levels. Cracking work.

[brianna vega]

thanks dear :]

[Rikkevi Rue]

mysterious and compelling, yet shining with a subtle lightheartedness. Your writing is like a butterfly with dark wings which reveal rich colors in the sunlight, floating suspended during some passages and racing down the wind in others. I most liked the aura of spirituality and your positioning of materialism beneath it. Enjoyable work

[brianna vega]

thank you love :] i love butterflies :]

[Kaylor Mason]

What a beautiful, musical poem! It was lovely to read

[brianna vega]

I keep getting an alert for a review comment yet nothing shows. why are you spazzing cafe!

[brianna vega]

how do i fix this?

[EMF]

Time patience and reporting it to the admin. Down at the bottom of the page.

[brianna vega]

haha when i sent them a message the are u human test said prickish

[EMF]

Typical.

[Sami Khalil]

Bravo on your nice poem...

[brianna vega]

thanks dear :] Im glad you enjoyed it :]

[Antonio Valentino]

waww.. this was pretty brilliant.. loved this part:

happiness floods me through the day

then i escape

to my cave of imagination

oh silly writers lift your voices

oh silly lovers

shift your eyes

im naked in this sentence

bare

a skeleton

a pile of meat

but do not decieve yourself

for this is all materialistic

one day i will float

through the heavens of memory


oh heck the beginning before that just leaded up to it... the whole piece then was fantastic..

love your style of writing..

:)

[brianna vega]

thank you love :] glad you enjoyed it :]

[Antonio Valentino]

aww.. you're very welcome.. :)

[Eloha]

The middle of this poem was delicious.

"oh silly writers lift your voices

oh silly lovers

shift your eyes

im naked in this sentence

bare "

amazing!

[brianna vega]

thank you love

[Relic]

Too hot to give a thoughtful review but this is Impressive writing. Good job.

[brianna vega]

im glad you liked it :]

[Relic]

:)

[zainul]

Wonderful piece.
Following sentences are amazing:
1.happiness floods me through the day
2.to my cave of imagination