Blink

Silence of me

 Blink at my affection

Brace yourself with emotional resitance

You hang yourself with rope made of memories

I hold nothing but my heart over your head

I’ve seen you at a young age

I know how you work

This isn’t exciting

Do I want to spend the time to break down the walls?

Do I want the damaged so close to my heart?

I break away in day dreams of solitude away from nightmares of freedom

I can’t stand myself

I can’t stand other people

I can’t even stand my friends or my family

I need an outlet

I am going to kill myself if I don’t find something soon

Scariest part about yesterday was the amazing relief I prospectively felt at swallowing all my pills

It seemed so comforting like a comforters upon comforters all over me

I am not ready to write about her yet

I need it to play out

A beautiful poem in the moment is not the picture I want to keep

I want the moments concluded

I want truth

I don’t want silver linings and open mouth kisses

I want breath

I want nothing.

I want the earth the swallow me up before my mind does

I feel like I am going crazy

Again.

This is not where I want to be.

I want solitude as to not to be seen

Or heard from

A memory for me is beautiful

Why should I keep f*****g up

Each day is another dillusion of my worth

Adding value I am done

Breathless sleep

You wake me when I feel you sleep

Your eyes remincent of the tears I have shed

I break your promise from the start

I miss you each second

Is it you?

Sirens of the city

She loves me more then the stars in the sky

I break the spell

Walking in the street I search for her