Lucid Dream

I was face up,

floating in my own eddies and ripples,

soaking in puddles of blistering sunlight.

 

I didn't expect a response.

 

But you landed heavy,

plunging me deep into my own depths,

colder currents that haven't been visited in over a year.

I felt old sediments that had finally settled

explode in a turbid, submerged cloud.

 

The temperature shock is almost surreal,

sudden and unexpected on my sunburned skin.

Seeing you in such an unfamiliar place,

so far from home,

gives me an uncanny sense of

meant-to-be.

 

If the mud dissipates,

I can reorient myself to find the surface.

If not,

I will be at the bottom

with this comforting weight I never thought

to have again. 

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Julie read requested me on this & I'm glad she did . . . she likes to expand the exposure for great writers who aren't getting much attention at the cafe yet. This is superb writing. I was completely immersed in your extended metaphor, so well-crafted with strong imagery for all the senses. The way your poem starts out, at first we're thinking: "dreaming" (becuz of the title) & it seems like a person is lying in bed or in a meadow, sleeping, dreaming. The following sensations feel topsy-turvy, just like dreaming can sometimes feel, & yet it's also a vivid realistic description of how it feels to be floating in turbulent waters, which creates a brilliant unspoken metaphor between the lines. This is really complex & fine awesome inspiring writing! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

love the metaphor here just loved it, keep writing!!