When I have a daughter......

When I have a daughter and she calls me “Mom” I won’t just be a “Mom” to her, I would want to be a “Part of Her” just like she is a “Part of Me”. I want to be born out of her as her stronger-self so that each time she wears the bruises and pains of this world,she can always find her way back to me, back to that part of herself she can retire to,submerge herself into the folds of my cloth and weep her heart out.

And then…….. I will tell my daughter--- “Baby, come let's wash your bruises away and you will see your scars are beautiful !  They hide a smile as bright as yours. They are here for a purpose just like you and they need you as much as you need them. So fondle them my child ! A pain doesn’t always break you, sometimes they just make you.

Don’t let these fashion magazines and beauty products make you feel inadequate. They will flourish on your insecurities and make you feel like a disaster. But you will always be so beautiful that even when you hate the color of your skin, that nose and those thick eyebrows,when you feel like a total disaster,you will still be the most beautiful one ever. God never makes mistakes.

Don’t change yourself for a man to be attracted to you. Don’t wait for a man to validate you. It’s okay to be un-lady like. To not have a perfect nose or a perfect figure.The man who will love you will love you for who you are. He wouldn’t bother if you have the shine of that perfectly waxed skin for he would look for the shine in your eyes. He wouldn’t care much about what or how you wear that dress for he would always care about how you wear that smile. It doesn’t matter to him how perfectly you watch your makeup or your hair for he would just want to sit and gaze as you watch the raindrops. Let him see the YOU in you. And fall in love with him as he falls in love with you. No matter how many times you were left heart-broken in the name of love, never stop believing because beautiful love stories happen. It happened with your mommy and daddy too!

But let no man raise their voice at you or disrespect you for being who you are. You are made out of his ribs and not his feet. Speak your mind always. Don’t get nervous and drown your voice in the noise of this social chaos. Your views and opinions are important. But make sure it doesn’t hurt anyone. So listen first, not just through your  ears but with all your heart and mind, listen before you speak so that when you speak the world is bound to listen!

And don’t you ever let that little girl die inside u. Your innocence makes you beautiful. I know this world will step at you to its advantage and try to turn you into everything but yourself. But don’t you ever make that child cry. Let her smile change the world but don’t let this world change her smile.

You will have days when you want it all to stop, when you would want things to cease, when you will be crushed between the judgements of the right and the wrong, when the people you love and want to save will be the ones standing on your cape , when the guy you feel so perfect for you will make you cry no matter how much he loves you, when you will be suffocating between living your dreams and carrying your responsibilities, when your friends will leave you at your worst, when that job threatens your merit and dignity, when you pass those nasty eyes ogling at you as a treat, when your boots will be filled with rain and its so heavy that you cannot take a step further, it is then that you have to learn to stand up for yourself. It will be hard, very hard, it will tear through you and make your heart and your eyes bleed. Your “Mom” has been there and seen it. And you will see it too. But I will be right there behind you to catch you in my arms when the world pushes you back. And with each thrust get up and shake off all the water from your boots, wear them again and make a move, bring life in all the things that ceased , go stand in front of what is right for now because life will in anyway change the question tomorrow, pull out your cape and save them because that’s your purpose and not theirs, go hug that guy with all your tears because he has hurt himself more in hurting you, carry your sincere responsibilities like a beautiful dream and live your dream sincerely like a beautiful responsibility,move on,they were never your friends in the first place, leave that job ,it's better to learn more before you earn more, don’t sell yourself, what’s sold is sold forever, God will give you what you deserve and Yes! For all those wandering eyes who wants a taste of you, better teach them how to swallow a burning flame!

And lastly! Don’t forget to love yourself and that earthy smell of the rain! You are born out of me but you will always be more than me. The world is your shadow and it is waiting to move along with you. It will be incomplete without you in it. You are that important not just to your “Mommy” and “Daddy” but to this whole world my baby for you still are a seed in its womb and only you can relieve it of its painful labour and when we are gone, remember what I told you for one day WHEN YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER…………………………… ! ”

Author's Note

HOPE YOU LIKE IT :)

Reviews

[1VJ]

Poignantly eloquent, as parents we sometimes tend to forget how perfectly designed our children truly are, I think you covered all the bases, on point in preparation for life's workouts. I wish every parent could live up to these expectations and beyond. Well done!

[Daisy]

Thank you Paloma for this gracious and thoughtful feedback :)

[barleygirl]

I only wish that the majority of parents could remember these good intentions, when times become harsh & challenging & frustrating . . . Altho I love what you're saying & I know your intentions are on the highest cloud nine, I prefer a more balanced message becuz I don't believe people can be this magnanimous very often. For this kind of message, you've done a superb job painting the picture of good wishes with many interesting & imaginative details. But I would sure hate to be the child that thinks he/she must live up to this. Most of us fail on our path to good intentions. It would be good to also have a few words of acceptance for such times when we rail at life & take things personally & lash out at others when we shouldn't. When I read this, I get the feeling that you want to right all wrongs in the world. I get the feeling you want your own daughter to avoid some of the harshness that you may have experienced. This is all fine & good . . . but I guess I'm too jaded to accept this one-dimensional message as being the whole lesson that a child needs to learn. I would also want a child to know that even when he/she has NOT had the most noble response to the s**t that life deals out, when the child has lived eons in a messy pig sty of muck, there's always a new day and a new chance to start back down a better path . . . and it will be hard as hell, but he/she can do it, & it will one day be very much worth it. Despite my more jaded take on your beautiful message, I really do wish my own parents had given me such guidance in the midst of their violence & degrading humiliations (((HUGS)))

[Daisy]

I absolutely second your strong and matured opinions. There is always that one perspective that we miss when we try to paint that larger than life concepts through words. M glad that I have such an amazing reader like you to help me evolve more as a person. Being only 25 (and practically not having a daughter because I am yet not married)and the experiences I have had so far I am sure to learn more from life and from amazing souls like you. Thanks a bunch for this warm feedback. Lots of love and God Bless !! :)

[Ali]

This is beautiful. There's a difference between becoming a mother and being one. Every child in this world deserves a mother like this.

Something tells me you'll be an awesome one !

Well done. Keep it up ! :)

[Daisy]

Thank you so much for this warm compliment! Means a lot :)

[Bear]

Critique: (Baby, come lets) let's - Lets is the third person singular form of the verb let, it means to allow or not prevent. Let’s is a contraction of let us.
(not just through your ears but through all your heart) but with all your heart ?
(when your boots will be filled with rain and its) it's
(go stand infront) in front
(its better to learn) it's

Review: Very nice life lessons piece, passing on wisdom to add to the knowledge pool people from the future can swim in and learn from is a testament to your humanity Bravo! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!

[Daisy]

I sincerely appreciate your valuable feedback! Have re-edited the story with the corrections you specified. Thank you for helping me evolve into a better writer :)

[Bear]

My pleasure, I am just trying to pass on the help I received when I started out :~)

[Daisy]

Thank You for that :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree. Great advice shared.
"Don’t change yourself for a man to be attracted to you. Don’t wait for a man to validate you. It’s okay to be un-lady like. To not have a perfect nose or a perfect figure.The man who will love you will love you for who you are. "
The above lines need to be taught to every female. I old my three daughters. Never depend on a man. Ensure you have a skill to be able to survive alone. Thank you for the powerful and amazing thoughts.
Coyote

[Daisy]

That is so true Coyote. Your a great father for sure! And thanks for the lovely feedback :)

[Coyote Poetry]

Was my pleasure and you are welcome.

[Ardra]

superb ....loved it...makes sense to tell it to every daughter :) ...keep sharing your creations love to read them

[Daisy]

Thanks Ria. Love your amazing feedbacks :)

[Robert Haigh]

This is a beautiful write. Wise words to tell your daughter... when the day comes!

[Daisy]

Thank You Robert :) Glad you liked it!