I just am

Written after a rough night of thought

My mother was a flower child, she had me late in life. She told me bedtime stories about all the things she's seen and done. She never hid the bad from me, she always told me the truth about the world. One of the first memories I have is of her telling me is that the world will look at me and label me and that the world will expect me to conform to the label it's given me and just go with the flow. She has repeated this lesson to me a thousand time since then, and tonight I think I understand what she meant to tell me was that I am not a label of any kind unless I allow myself to be.

I am young - it is a label I will gladly accept - to be young is to have time, to learn, to make up my mind and change it a thousand times. To be young is to make mistakes, to fall and get back up. To be young is to need others and no one - and sometimes both need and not need others at the same time. I am young...

I am a man - it is a label I will accept but only on my own terms...I refuse to conform to stereotypical man - I will not watch football, I don't think the head cheerleader is beautiful. I don't give a damn about how a car works and I refuse to have a conversation about which girls will put out and which ones won't. I will be a male on my own terms - I will enjoy cooking - I will cry every time bambi's mom gets killed, and I will f*****g let my little sister and her monster friends put glitter in my hair just to make them happy. I am a man...

I am gay - is no longer a label I will accept. I think a man smiling is beautiful and a man laughing is sexy. I love that the man next door washes his truck barefooted in only a pair of jean that look like there sewn on to him. I love the look of a mans hands after he's been working in the dirt. I love the way men walk, talk, smile, flirt, f**k...you name it and if a man dose it I may possibly love it. But when I meet a woman that peeks my interest, challenges me, and has an air of mystery I reserve the right to want to know what makes her tick. If I look up and my eyes meet a woman's and I feel as if I've known her my entire life I reserve the right to hold her and kiss her. And if a woman caresses my cheek and i feel sparks fly I reserve the right to act on those sparks.

I suppose I could accept the label bi - but to me it'd be a lie, I don't find breasts to be beautiful - but if I meet a woman with a warm heart and makes me feel warm inside just so happen s to have breasts I may want to ask her out. I really don't particularly care for images of vagina's in my head, but if a woman that could make me feel floaty and shiny and they just so happened to have a vagina then I may want to sleep with her. I suppose what i 'm saying is I find each and ever mans body attractive but I reserve the right that if a womans personality, heart or nature attracts me that I can act on that attraction.

So please if you must give me labels then use these.

I am young

I am male

and

I just am

Reviews

[CLUTZ]

LOVE IT!!!!! No labels, I read this sort of like a poem because it kind of flowed to me. I don't know why, but I like this and enjoyed reading it.