7 reasons not to read this

see text.

see note for reviewers.

Author's Note

1. lateral self-assurance gone awry while smoking pedestal sedentary bow-flys
2. bubble gum princess sock covered candy straps
3. tips of pens chewed by people named phil living in the 8th quarter of the nearest mall in your neighborhood
4. lights burning out to the beat of boy george
5. tablets of sewage treatment in lourdes
6. open plastic bags in small numbered packs being shipped every which way to the tap of a door mat
7. speakers for sale in the aunt of the king of the nation that 91% of those who feel that angels are real whose heartburn is taking over the center region of their cerebellum