iodine, baby oil, mormons & the end of the world as we know it

see note for reviewers.

when caucasians talk about

spreading iodine & baby oil on themselves in order to

sit out in the sun

and

burn themselves to a different color,

it makes me think of those girls who

milk the tanning huts during the winter months

in order to create the illusion that they are

orange

all year round.

 

when these idiots look in the mirror,

outside the obvious fact that they are not happy with

themselves & are

insecure in their own

skin,

what is it that makes them leap that extra foot to

assume the color of a

road construction sign?

 

don’t they know that they are orange?

can’t they see the brightness bouncing back at them?

don’t they have any non-orange friends who are

happy being themselves,

who would say…

“um,

you’re orange…you know that?”

 

it makes me wonder what racists do when their

orange teenage daughter

comes home from a day of tanning---

if the shrewd KKK daddy runs upstairs to get his

cleanest white sheet &

then quickly cuts out eyeholes

like the principle did on South Park in order to cover up

cartman’s forechosen

hitler costume,

throwing it over his daughter &

sighing with relief.

 

it makes me wonder what mormons who initially

said in their “holy book” that

those who were not “white, and exceedingly fair and delightsome”

(the uncursed),

were “cursed” with blackness by “god”

(“God did cause a skin of blackness to come upon them.” 2 Nephi 5:21-22)

& to take it all a step further,

that mitty

(republican presidential hopeful, mitt romney),

a man who believes in the words of

joseph smith, the plates, pre-existent spirits, the modern “prophet” thomas spencer monson, jesus in america, multiple worlds & multiple gods, etc.

will be a good man to have his

finger

on

the

button.   

Author's Note

Joseph Smith: I have, in my possession, an ancient book written on gold plates that tells of Jesus Christ's second coming. Here, in America.
Martin Harris: In America? Really? That sounds kind of –
Chorus: Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb.

-from “All About the Mormons?” South Park, Episode 12, Season 7