the promise

somewhere along the way

s/he lost track of themselves---

perhaps it was because they had been

hurt before & swore to never go into

anything full swing again,

or perhaps it was out of a genuine

dislike of themselves---

either way, the passion was there in the

beginning

(as it always is),

and with it came the words---

words that seem to come naturally

even though they are said by the same people

to different people

a thousand times before our death

words that fill the air with new life & energy

when they first appear again

words that coax us with comfort like the

inevitable calm before the coming storm &

finally those same words that cut like razorblades

& streak down the blackboard simultaneously

with horror movie violins creaking & clanging

in the furthest regions of our heads

when everything falls apart.

 

there was a promise promulgated in that sea

of first flowering words

a promise that no matter how much it is exemplified on

television or in films for its dramatic purpose,

always seems to con someone under its wing---

this promise that one of the passionate two

would eventually leave their spouse for the other

this promise that the affection that at present was being

hidden behind closed doors

would someday be able to flourish amongst the public world

with all of the boisterous spontaneity of a real health

relationship,

free of any guilt that the two might be feeling

while they worked their magic behind the back(s)

of those that they already had made promises to.

 

and yet as the early bliss of love turns into the

neurological disease of which it can seem to fester as

all the other moments of life with a person who no longer

interests the other party,

like rotting milk

it’s stink fills the room &

inevitably the apology begins---

long & drawn out with too many words that are all saying the

same thing---

it is over.

 

one of the promisers didn’t pass the litmus test &

so the less guilty goes back to their spouse

honoring that ridiculous charade that is known as

marriage &

the guilty party

now dumped by the person that they were having an affair with

walks back out into the world

with a feeling that they were not even good enough

for someone who is already married.