father to be

na.

he never wanted to be a father

he told himself that he would do everything in his power

to fend off all possibilities of

spawning &

he lived fast, wanting to die young---

burning bridges &

rolling to gather no moss,

but inevitably,

as the cliché opens itself up for the stage,

a knock came at the door &

after he remembered who it was,

she told him that she was keeping it---

now,

he had his tantrum,

he threw the door closed,

he sat in the chair alone in his abode &

festered,

wishing & wanting

to do things over again,

but there was nothing he could do.

 

he told her he didn’t believe it was hers &

he told her he wanted a paternity test &

when she had one,

it was certain.

 

this father to be was disappointed

this father to be was angry that she was having it

this father to be wanted nothing to do with the kid

this father to be decided to leave &

as the story goes,

he never came back.

 

the young boy grows up without a father

the young boy grows up knowing he wasn’t wanted

the young boy grows up wondering why his mother

decided to have him in the first place &

when he begins to have sex

he swears it will never happen to him,

that he will take precautions,

because he never wants to be a

father.