the multigrain cheese puff

once had a friend from the Netherlands

who when walking with me in the city

stopped in a bodega & saw a pack of

cheddar cheese & pretzel

Combos---

i bought them in an instant &

asked him if he wanted some,

however, with a bit of stereotypical

snobbery, he turned up his nose saying something to the

effect of

“there has never been something so american as

Combos…fake sodium pumped cheese inside of stale

carbs & salt” &

i could only imagine if he stumbled upon the same

bag of Bachman’s Multigrain Baked Cheese Curls,

which i saw today &

how his heart might have just

stopped,

as he gasped for breath amidst the

NYC pollution.