playing with the young christian’s head

when i was in 6^th grade,

i can remember the rumors from a neighboring school spun

about a young girl around my age

who had gone into the bathroom &

rambled on “bloody mary” repeatedly in front of the mirror---

apparently, as the story went, she ended up in the hospital

because she had been traumatized by something that

“attacked” her in the bathroom &

the scared little christians who populated the middle of nowhere elementary school

thought that demons, or a witch, or something

downright awful

had shone its face to the girl,

and so, as little kids do

(unfortunately, no different than “adults”),

the morbid curiosity & a combination of boredom throughout the day

forced some of them to go into the bathroom at my school &

repeat the same idiotic behavior

in order to “summon” whatever it was that

had been rumored to show up

when you should’ve been pissing or taking a s**t.

 

my own threshold for annoyance had about been pushed to its limit &

so i myself went into the bathroom, turned the light off

(so my moronic classmates could see the crack under the door become dark) &

proceeded to dig my fingertips (never had much fingernail growth as i bite them like a fiend) into my neck enough as to leave a few red streaks---

and i put my favorite shocked face on, flicking on the light again &

walking out into the classroom.

 

with wide eyes like those of parishioners of an evangelical psycho,

they stared up at me, a nonbeliever, in a combination of brand new horror,

mixed with a self-righteous “i told you so, now don’t you believe?  ain’t ya gonna come over to our side of the tracks now?” look

painted all over their faces.

 

after i sat down,

depicting as much fake shock & horror that i could muster,

i started to laugh with a mixture of disgust

stemming from looking in their brainwashed eyes &

utter relief,

that i myself could not be made to believe as they.