Flashback (the Flood)

The land caved in beneath the piled, faceless.

The stench of rotting meat.
The buzzing flies.
This memory -
hate grant me strength to face this
crisp sunset

and the virgin azure skies.
Vacant eye sockets seem to house a question,
the air is pregnant with the latent grief,
and silence,
like a silent accusation -
"We are all dead, so how dare you live?"
Inlay of mingled limbs and mangled torsos
against the golden opulence of sand
and a child lost,
alone among the corpses,
who doesn't understand....

 

Reviews

[SilentVerses]

Such a shortened piece of macabre that allows the power to truly flow fluid throughout, as a haunting sorrow of eerie silence descends upon the reader the words begin to sink within the depths. Such an elegant beauty that you write with allows the shock to creep and crawl over the secretive anguish of your melody. Hauntingly harrowing and sorrowful filled with a desolate despair, but with a heightened beauty due to the words you have chosen

[George Korolog]

Powerful and full of expressive phrasing. Fantastic opening two lines. Reallly got my attention. The only suggestion that I would make is that I would try to avoid overused word combinations or words like "virgin azure" and "opulence" I had to try hard to find something here that might be helpful becasue this is a really good piece of work.

[emmajoy]

Reading these expertly phrased words like looking into a deep, dark pit, cold, cruel, petrifying - there's almost too much to see, too many feelings erupting out of the meaning of '.. a child lost, alone among the corpses, who doesn't understand .. '

You write with special vision, Julie, albeit it horrific in this case.

[Raymond]

"hate grant me strenght to face this crisp sunset"...excellent.