First Star

I wrote this for school as a project. I got a 100 on it.

First Star

                Have you ever wondered how the first star was created? Well the answer to that question will be found in this story that I am about to tell you. It all started when Shooting Star looked up at the sky.

                “Shooting Star, what are you looking at,” asked her husband named Deer Hunt. She looked at him for a second and she looked back up at the sky.

                “I’m looking at the sky,” she said.

                “Why,” her husband asked.

                “Well I don’t think there is enough light coming down from the moon,” Shooting Star told her husband. Her husband left her staring at the moon. He wasn’t interested in that kind of stuff. He thinks it was weird that she thinks there isn’t enough light out. He thought there was enough light.

                ‘What is wrong with that woman,’ he thought to himself.

                Shooting Star was still in the same place when she heard footsteps coming from behind her.

                “Mommy, mommy,” called her daughter Star Bright in a voice that sounded like she was upset.

                “Yes, honey,” Shooting Star said in a soothing voice.

                “Hunter, he pushed me to the ground and I have cuts on my hands now,” her daughter cried. Her daughter was four years old. Shooting Star picked up her daughter and walked over to Hunter’s house.

                “Dancing Daughter, can you come out here a moment,” asked Shooting Star.

                “Yes, Shooting Star,” asked Dancing Daughter.

                “Your son pushed my little girl and didn’t apologize,” Shooting Star said calmly.

                “Hunter apologize to Star Bright right now,” Dancing Daughter said. He came out and made a quick apology.

                They walked off and Shooting Star put her daughter to sleep. She walked back outside.  She looked back up at the sky. She still was obsessed with the sky not having that much light.

                She thinks it’s too dark to see anything although they have fire. She doesn’t want artificial light though she wants something different. She wants something that is like the moon, but smaller and a lot of them.

                “Shooting Star, it’s time to go to bed my darling,” called her husband.

                “I’ll be there in a minute,” she said.  As she looked at the sky one more time before she followed her husband inside the teepee.

                The next day Shooting Star went back to look at the sky when it turned night. When she stepped five feet from her house then a light surrounded her when she looked into the sky. The light was warm and it felt nice on her skin.

                She shot up into the sky like a rocket and she saw all the ones she loved from where she was going. She was put into a position in the shy where she could watch over her family.

                The next day her husband went searching for her. He couldn’t find her and he looked into the sky. He saw a white dot that was not familiar to him or anyone in his tribe. He decided to name it after his wife. He named it Star because it reminded him of how his wife wanted something else besides the moon.

                That was how the first star that was in the sky was created.

Author's Note

Fake story.

Reviews

[Eric Cox]

I love the night and the stars. This is a cool fantasy write.

[The Dudeman (Kenneth T)]

It's cool. It actually sounds like a Native American traditional story. It's got some places where it can be improved though, such as why Shooting Star just left her family to live in the sky, and why the scene with her daughter was relevant. Maybe you should re-write the details on this story, but the idea and concept are great.