Etymology of losing

Dichotomy. Polemics.
Some words nest like blue
birds in the smallest

hollows of my mind, diffusing
until every thought is one
color. I can not look

at them without
seeing red-headed
people. I cannot see red
headed people

without the world seeming
different-to-distant-to-brighter
with a scalpel-glint

kind of cognizance. The helicopters
rumble overhead here
regular as birds, and I
see men running

underneath them like
marionettes. I see men
running, and would you
know, it is another

thing I cannot see
without the flutter

of ducks tearing a ford
through the empty field
of my heart.

Author's Note

2016

Reviews

[nazia]

Your free verses give rise to a beautiful rhythm... The way you described the presence of helicopters, men, the chaos caused by them because of which the beauty of the world comes to a standstill as we have no time to appreciate it... It leaves one with a taste of guilt..
Well written :)

[Eilis]

Hi, Nazia. Thanks for this thoughtful comment. I appreciate you reading and sharing your ideas.

[Laz K.]

Others have already pointed out the merits of this poem, and they did so rightfully. I can only add that it's a consolation to read it for anyone going through similar experiences. The healing power of poetry...

[Eilis]

Many thanks, Laz. Glad you could appreciate the poem.

[barleygirl]

This is butt-kicking abstract writing, some of the most original I've read. Usually I'm not good at writing that's not straightforward, but even tho your imagery is way outside the dots, it's still clear what you're getting across. This is a fresh & unusual combination of observations which fits together like it was meant to be (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Eilis]

Hi, Margie. Thank you very much for your enthusiastic comment. I’m so pleased with what you have to say.

Thanks for your visit!

[CD Campbell]

I've had to read this several times to wrap my head around it. There's the title, which is self explanatory. The first line is of division and attack. We go on from there to describe what I see as one train of thought that doesn't want to deviate or can't. It reminds me of whenever I get depressed or angered, I can't seem to shake it and have to follow those feelings till they die. Regardless if there is beautiful sunset in the distance.
I like the visuals of the helicopter and its puppets. One thing I want to say is that this poem is a heavy one. It's not fluff or bullshit. I still think i might be off on a few points, but that's what re-reading is for.

[Eilis]

Thanks very much, CD. I knew this was a tough one. I really only shared it here to see if it made sense to anyone outside the experience. I have 400+ poems and I think most of them are just for me. This was one of those. But, I’d say you got the underlying mood/idea with your first paragraph. Which made me happy as the writer throwing my child out the world, ha ha.

The world (life) being full of beauty but the mood prohibiting access to it. That was the key for me.

The poem is about a particular loss and the maze of trying to move past it. It’s never just one feeling, I guess, but a barrage.

Really appreciate what you had to say on this. Thanks again.

[CD Campbell]

No problem. It's a good one.

[Robert Trakofler]

words resonate in my mind constantly they bounce there tones next each other until the tone of the tune takes notes to my scrawls too very telling this free verse and a lovely one at that:)

[Eilis]

Yes, the word dance. A side effect of the poetry. Thanks for the cool comment, Robert.

[Kay Salisu Titilola]

Feel the free verse as notion of trying to build up courage in the midst of chaos. When everyone is running for his own survival. While standing in confusion of what is happening and trying to figure it out. This is what the poem whispered in my ear.

Well written, Eilis.

[Eilis]

Very cool, Kay. Thanks for sharing that. Much appreciation for your comment.

[gram linski]

delicious language and imagery and poetry and mind, every line is a joy to read, the
etymology of losing is tangible and real, great title, by the way

[Eilis]

Hi, Gram. Thank you. I’m thinking more about titles, ha. Maybe I’m making progress.

read moreHi, Gram. Thank you. I’m thinking more about titles, ha. Maybe I’m making progress.

Thanks for reading.

[kentuck14]

I can imagine the steam rising from your head after composing your poems! You definitely take us further into the woods than most poets on this site. We need to drop breadcrumbs on the way, or else we might not find our way back! Thanks for the trip.
T

[Eilis]

ha ha, thanks Tom. It's good to hear from you. All good wishes to you.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

The first three stanzas had the hook well and truly embedded in my cranium. There are many interesting scenes described her together with emotions. The helicopters appeared to disrupt the beauty and the tranquility, brining the whole thing down to earth.

[Eilis]

Hi, John. Thanks for reading. I think you’re right about those helicopters. All the best