After the divorce

At nine pm any day of the week,
I can get in the car and drive to see

the men in dark clothing hiding
in the middle of the street. They

walk like mirages or memories and
I’m not exactly sure if I would pass

through them if I were not able
to swerve away. You know that feeling

of being in a dream but you are moving
alongside the moving. This isn’t a dream.

It is the mystification of being new
in a town so far from where I came

no one even recognizes the old name.
They stumble over the sounds. Tongue

the back of their teeth trying to say it
like a baby rolling the marbles of new

words around on her tongue. Not far
off, I can hear the music of congregation,

of old friends every night - voices rising
above barrel fires. They warm themselves

outside the crumpled aluminum-foil
trailers with a kind of laughter I’ve never

heard. But I cannot see them. These times
it is fair to say there is not much more

than fire to turn on the light in eyes
that have been cauterized by the strange

branding of this back-turned world.

Author's Note

2024

Reviews

[Twilight]

I concur with Julie's review. Well, her list.

But, there is far more expressed poetically; in this piece. And, quite a few metaphors which only the writer could be aware of having used.

There is possibly, a divorce between your married life of the past; and alternate reality of what follows on from that.

So, in a way; it reads as if you're representing the new doubts and realities of that immediate form of "after life" (so to speak).

It includes a few cryptic passages too, and also conveys a kind of dazed dream-like perception of the new reality? Generally, expressed as a dark phase; including one or too moments of sad nostalgic longing.?

[Eilis]

Hi, thanks for reading and sharing your impressions. I was reaching for a few things here, yes, partially my own understanding and partially trying to articulate the strangeness of such a significant after. It was a thirty year relationship so the after-time has many significant new paths and it is overwhelming. That is what I a trying to work through in the poem. Dream-like is definitely a good description. Appreciate your thoughts.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

It's a new life full of freedom whether celebrated or mourned. Prisoners can learn to love their chains but it doesn't make them any less shackled. We need those in our lives that help us be free and celebrate our independence with us as friends. My wife is my best friend and I'd be lost without her but she is free and I am free, not that we contemplate on it. She still asks if I mind when she has things to do. I still ask but we are not begging approval, merely being respectful of each other. Trust is the key because no relationship, none, can exist long without trust. We celebrate an anniversary tomorrow and I'm looking forward to that.

[Eilis]

Congratulations on your anniversary, Fabian. That’s great. I was with my spouse since age sixteen. We married at 22. I will be 50 next year. It’s a strange place to be at this point in my life. I do feel quite lost. But I’m at the beginning so I know there will be different times. It’s a matter of getting from here to there. I’m glad you’ve found such a great connection. I wish you both all the best. Thanks for sharing your experience.

[Ken Simm.]

You take the atmospheres of events and lives and make it your own. Excellent writing. Extraordinary seasonal writing.

[Eilis]

Hi, Ken. Thanks so much for your kind thoughts. I appreciate you reading.

[Throwing Romeo]

I think you're borne to write poetry.,
R.

[Eilis]

What a kind thing to say. Thank you

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Can I also say if at allpossible stay good friends
It works better well it’s hard at first very
It’s not always possible

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Marriage is a huge bond
It also entails memory of kids
Xmas
birthdays
wedding night
honeymoon
holidays
sex
lovemaking
pmt
Bbq
Picnics
fights
makeups
Budgeting
Houses
Yards
the shopping days
The cooking the washing up ironing just the whole thing being a family
It’s huge
Not to mention love

Did I miss anything out

You described it well !

Well done x

[Eilis]

Thanks for your understanding comment, Julie. You are right there is so much there. We are staying civil. With kids it is a must, you are right. I appreciate your visit.

[Pryde Foltz]

The loss of a marriage isn't just a loss of a partner but also a chunk of one's identity, name, and the role of wife. Such a jarring experience, the loss of home. Making the usual feel strange. A super strong pen you wield:)

[Eilis]

Thanks so much, Pryde. I appreciate your insightful comment.

[Ballpark Frank]

Cool writing style. I savored this. Very unique stuff.

This typexl of aloneness can be actually painful as well discouraging. Well captured Eilis!

[Eilis]

Hi, Franky, thank you! Glad you enjoyed the poem

[Paul in the Buff]

I was immediately drawn to the title of this writing. Such a challenging subject that so many of us have to process, and make peace with, I'm always interested in how others manage it. Your poem is engaging, and very visual. The line breaks in what feel like should be a continuous thought is very representative of the struggles to make sense of a new situation, reconciling the old, and finding a new way forward. Thank you for sharing this.

[Eilis]

Hey, Paul. I appreciate your insightful comments. There is definitely the stop start effect that comes with learning who you are in a new life. Divorce is not like anything I expected. No real way to prepare yourself for how it will feel. Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts.

[Joli Dy]

And now I am haunted; "men in dark clothing hiding in the middle of the street" and cauterized eyes will be my companions tonight. I welcome such hauntings.

[Eilis]

Hi, Joli. I love how alive we can be in the middle of new experiences and how much that makes us see. Thank you for your visit.

[Joli Dy]

That speaks directly to the season I find myself in. It is not a season I chose, but yes, everything is vibrant, new, and filled with possibility. Thank you for that insight.

[Eilis]

The intensity of these times is difficult to go through, the best we can do, I guess, is hold on to the hope of better things.

[Joli Dy]

...and each other. You're a good soul.

[Eilis]

Indeed. Thank you, Joli! That’s very kind